Ocean isle beach nc restaurants

BACKSTORY: tldr
Sootsprinkle (now known as Inkle), a bird with mottled black and grey feathers, embarks on a journey beyond his home forest. Armed with a map from his father, he quickly becomes lost due to the forest's uniformity. As night falls, he encounters strange luminescent blobs that captivate him. Following one of them, he discovers another blob trailing behind him. Intrigued, he observes multiple processions of these blobs converging towards a distant point.
Reaching a clearing, Sootsprinkle finds himself surrounded by an impenetrable darkness. When he attempts to land, he realizes there is no ground beneath him and starts falling into a seemingly endless void. As he plummets, he contemplates his father, the sign he made, and the creatures he encountered. Eventually, he loses consciousness due to his ever increasing velocity.
Upon waking, Sootsprinkle is greeted by an elf and an old man who rescued him from their well. Confused but relieved, he introduces himself as "Sootpinkie Sprinkle." They inquire about his origins, and he tells them about his forest, his father, and the peculiar journey that led him to their location. The elf lady, named Zindi, decides to help him and invites him inside their dwelling.
They tell Sootsprinkle they are in The Vastlands, main continent of Arcavios and that they can help him become acquainted with their ways, history and educational requirements.
Long months of studying ensue, but Sootsprinkle proves his worth with an excellent memory despite subpar recitations. He learns how to write in common and begins to learn elvish under Zindi's tutelage.
During his studies, he takes an interest in the magic Zindi and the old man perform on a daily basis, seemingly effortlessly. He asks questions tirelessly and without the usual stuttering.
They mention that the University of Strixhaven, the most elite school of mages in the multiverse, is only a few days journey from their home and encourage him to apply. He wonders desperately about his father and the forest village he left behind, but decides his dad is too busy being rich and applies to Strixhaven in the end. Still, he vows to return not only literate but as a wizard and a scholar.
He is accepted swiftly by the college of Lorehold, despite being just around their average standards, once he mentions the odd void that brought him to their lands. This college of scholars set their motto "Leave no stone unturned" deep into young Sootsprinkle. He adventured often, despite his small size. On one expedition he found a shiny green pebble and took it back to his professors who laughed and told him it was just a regular rock that was shiny and green. Sootsprinkle kept it anyway.
Later, he found a feather trapped in fossilized resin and excavated it with great care. It was in near pristine condition, blacker than his own and twice as big. When he made his way back, he decided to do independent research in the library to avoid being laughed at again. A blackish ink sprang forth from the tip, staining countless books before he stuck it in his mouth swallowing nearly a bucket full of the rancid liquid. Sootsprinkle was swiftly brought to the infirmary where he made a full recovery and gained a new nickname "Inkwell". He liked it, but decided to pay homage to his old name and family by changing the ending to "le".
Worried about getting kicked out, he explained the entire situation, without stuttering and was granted leniency. This was partially due to his discovery of the unique feather, which was confiscated until head scholars had learned everything they could about it and deemed it safe for him to retain. It was his pride and joy, he wrote many flawless papers with it and about it.
He spent nearly zero time eating, sleeping or making friends. He loved listening to his peers speak and learning from them and always tried his best to reply when they talked to him first, but never went out on his own to seek them out.
In his 3rd year there, he decided to start researching the black void more closely. No one had heard of such a thing although many theories were thrown about here and there. The old man's well was studied day and night one year, under almost permanent surveillance. Nothing but water ever came out again. There was nothing odd about the well.
Inkle decided to take his research to the Biblioplex, supposedly the most massive collection of knowledge in all of the known multiverse. He had been before but the sheer size of the place left him a little upset, knowing he could never possibly read everything in there. He returned sparingly over the previous 2 years.
The librarian and codex proved invaluable to his research although the anomaly had never been seen in the form it took that fateful day, the effects resembled those of the creature known as Vormox, an enormous, worm-shaped anomaly with iridescent scales and a serpentine body.
It possesses the ability to teleport matter by consuming it. When it devours something, it absorbs its energy and essence. The consumed matter is transformed into energy, and "defected", intact, at another location (Usually somewhere random in the vacuum of space or mashed inside another object. In this case, it seems it was the old man's well.
The futility of his situation hit him then, there was absolutely no way to locate this creature in all the infinite locations it could be in and no way to manipulate it to take him back to the right home in the right timeline in the right reality.
Inkle was not worried that he would never see his father again, that was a near certainty. Distraught, he sought comfort in both learning and psychedelic substances, many of which he modified at random. His 108th trial was on an unremarkable evening with an unremarkable substance that he already knew through and through. An odd fungus boiled down, mixed with any alcohol, and magically flavored with a new taste he came up with called "pitch". It was a heavy flavor, it tasted like the top of your mouth, only more. Or like nothing, only less.
Too lazy to grab a cup tonight, he conjured a health potion and dumped in the pitch flavored liquid, filling it to the brim before downing the whole concoction at once. He went to lay down in his bed but substance kicked in nearly immediately.
Vibrant colors danced before his eyes, swirling and merging in an ethereal symphony of hues. Reality twisted and contorted, shifting like a mirage in the desert. His bed seemed miles away, but he made a lunge for it and felt something soft before closing his eyes. And yet, something was wrong.
In this altered state, he felt a profound disconnection with the universe, as if he could touch the very essence of creation but never be a part of it. He floated through cascading patterns of geometric shapes, each one unfolding with intricate precision. Fear led him into a small pocket of a reality in a corner of his mind left untouched since childhood. The air here calmed him and the room faded. Time and space became malleable, merging and folding in on themselves. The sharp points of the fractals were gone.
The journey reached its crescendo. He emerged from the undulating abyss into a realm not unlike his own. He saw grass so green it almost looked real. In fact it felt pretty real too, although the substance has never given him tactile hallucinations before. Unconcerned, he took a bite of probably the most grass flavored grass he'd even encountered.
The air crackled with energy, and the atmosphere hummed with an otherworldly resonance, promising endless adventures and profound revelations. No sooner than one flap of his wings and Inkle smashed into the ground, and blacked out, head throbbing all the while.
Unbeknownst to him, Inkle had crossed a threshold in his own mind entering a reality in some space and time entirely different than his own. He had in fact, not landed on his bed and instead fell through one of those tiny cracks in reality that are only visible when you close your eyes.
He dreamed of the nothingness, discovering his entire self in the absence of a mind. The pain of losing his home dimension felt so insignificant compared to the nothingness. He wondered about love and companionship but realized he wouldn't care to experience it again, but rather would like to know and catalogue it along with as many other things as possible. He looked around and saw his quill and then his body and willed himself towards them.
When he woke up to the sound of birds, he was on a patch of grass on a beach staring at a vast and dark ocean.

So, I know that the last few posts I've made have been a little critical and sounded unappreciative of the dev's hard work.
And, I thought it would be nice for people to discuss the positives for them personally from what we have seen so far and what has been confirmed as in the game.
Positives for me (that has not lessened any since the original announcement):

• World Customization! The fact that we can place lots any where we want made my brain go into overdrive thinking about all of the cool venues I wanted to have. So I figure even if we can't make multi-purpose venues, we should be able to place them really close to each other to at least give the illusion of them being part of the same building. Or maybe even making the lot huge to accommodate various
• Open World! What good is a cool looking world if your immersion is broken because your whole story line gets interrupted from hitting a loading screen just to visit that local dive next door to your house!
• There's a Beach in the Base game! Even if there's no swimming or water activities in the beginning, we already know you can dig for shells and troves and sun bath from the very beginning!
• So many modes of transportation! There's a bus! And skateboards, bikes, motorcycles and cars! That are ALL FUNCTIONAL! None of this fake vfx like some games!
• Laundry is in the Base Game! I know not everybody enjoys the little realistic mundane activities for their characters in games, but it is something that I enjoy. So the fact that laundry (a part of every single person's real life) is in the Base Game and we don't have to wait years for it, is amazing!
• So much Gym Equipment in the Base Game! So many things to make an awesome gym already in the game!
• Customization options! I can tell you how fantabulous that is for me! That will limit so many mods I'd have to try and find, just being able to set things a certain way.
• 10 Traits/Background Settings! I actually wonder if I'll use them all (ok I'm sure I'll eventually get over the shock of getting to choose so many per character)
• Individual Money! And they showed that ATM Machine, I'm wondering if there will be some sort of banking system.
• Observables! I can't wait to see what everybody observes and how it affects game play. I'm hoping that when we are not playing our main character and they see something while we're not controlling them, that when we go back to playing them that observable is mentioned and effects certain game play randomly!
• Material/Colorwheel! OMG! Between this, the open world, and the freely placed lots, I became obsessed! I can't tell you how many times I've cussed and ranted and raved about the crappy mismatched swatches in TS4, which requires me to hunt for CC. But, with a colopattern customization capabilities that will help eliminate a lot of basic furniture CC for me personally!
• Shopping in Base Game! Who would have ever thought that would be possible!
• Hotels, Salons, and Restaurants in the Base Game! I just can not wait to see what this whole entire hotel system is all about!

Should I consider water shoes for the beaches in Maui? I’m a wimp when it comes to stuff at the bottom of the ocean 🤦🏻‍♀️

Hello! My husband and I went on our first-ever cruise on the MSC Meraviglia earlier this month and it just occurred to me that it might be nice to post a review. Since the biggest questions I see people ask about with MSC are "how is the food?" and "why do people hate the food?" I thought I'd do a food review. Obviously I can't compare it with any of the other cruise lines, but we like to eat out and are willing to spend money on a great meal so that's what I am comparing it to. We've eaten at Michelin starred restaurants and typically avoid chains but on a normal day we're making spaghetti with meat sauce or dumping frozen garlic chicken pasta into a pot like the average American.
Before I get started with this, I need to note that I have been dealing with a health issue that makes me constantly somewhat queasy and have little appetite. While I've lost a bunch of weight I do not recommend this method. However, some days I feel better than others, and I had a couple of good days on the trip, enough to try a couple of specialty restaurants, but not enough to try everywhere I wanted to.
So MSC food is *different*. It's like when you go to Europe and the food isn't really unfamiliar, but you don't find the stuff you're used to eating. They don't really have fried food, they didn't seem to have bags of chips or candy. On days I didn't feel well, I ordered a chicken sandwich from room service. It came on thin-sliced white bread with no crusts, with sliced roasted chicken (not deli slices), tomato, and darker greens. The potato chips were hand-sliced potatoes and tasted like potatoes pan-fried with a little salt. There was a small side-salad too, again with darker greens, not iceberg or romaine, dressed with a little vinagrette. I got chocolate-chip cookies for dessert, and they were crisp and the size you'd get making them at home, not the giant size you usually get here. And it was all delicious! Hopefully that helps to clarify what I mean by "different".
My husband ate at Kaito Sushi by himself, and I joined him at Butcher's Cut and Ocean Cay specialty restaurants. He said the sushi was good, not spectacular, but at least as good or better than we get in our Midwestern city (which has a well-respected food scene). He liked it enough to eat there twice. At Butcher's Cut, I had bone marrow with parsley sauce for an appetizer, filet mignon and crispy fries for the entrée, and lava cake with vanilla ice cream for dessert. The steak was done perfectly medium-rare, per my request. I didn't try the sauces on the steak because it didn't need them. The scoop of ice cream with the lava cake was small but rich and creamy. Best, though, were the fries. OMG the fries were the most amazing thing I have ever tasted! I cannot express how much I loved them. Steak fries, perfectly crisp and lightly salty with almost a caramelized crust on the outside, perfectly soft and almost melty on the inside. If I could only eat those fries for the rest of my life, I would die happy. This was as good a meal as we would get at a higher-end steakhouse, and definitely worth buying the package.
At Ocean Cay, I had the crackling fennel salad (very good, and a large portion), the roasted lobster tail with bourbon vanilla cream and pureed carrots (very surprising and delicious flavors, not sure that I would have roasted lobster again) and crème brulée (large portion, very rich, so much that I couldn't finish it though I sure tried). I tried my husband's crab cakes - they were tender and seasoned fine for me but he thought they were a bit bland. His tuna steak was good, though. The waitstaff there were particularly attentive and helpful. Worth it with the package, though I got the lobster off the regular menu.
We are not drinkers so did not get an alcohol package. I got a glass of wine with supper at both specialty restaurants, but there were surprisingly few choices by the glass. They were both nice wines but I would have liked a few more options. BTW, there are AA meetings ("Friends of Bill W") every evening in the "library" - more a corner with some bookshelves - in case you need them.
We only ate in the main dining room once for supper. I would say it's like eating at a mid-range restaurant, maybe like a local chain. Not the best meal ever, but far from the worst. This is where you're most likely to find food that is closer to a typical American restaurant - they had meatloaf and potatoes as one option the night we went. Again, the staff is fantastic and are happy to give you more cheese or pepper or leave off the sauce, etc.
We ordered continental breakfast every day but one (it was free with our Fantastica experience). Pain au chocolate every morning, with fresh fruit! The only bad part was that I couldn't get a diet coke delivered with it - my husband ran up to the buffet to get some for me every morning. He said his coffee was great, though, plus he got big bottles of Sanpellegrino all day, so he was happy. We tried eggs and bacon one morning, but it wasn't that great. I had pain au chocolate with a little peanut butter and fruit the rest of the time and was quite content.
The buffet was big and very busy whenever I went to it. They had multiple stations for the more popular items, but I don't think everyone realized that. The pizza was, in fact, very good, but again it is not much like American pizza. The slices were large but had thin, flexible crusts that were not greasy and did not have tons of cheese or tomato sauce. There were pepperoni slices when I was there, but also white pizza and different kinds of veggie slices. The one closest to plain cheese was either pepperoni or one that had small slices of zucchini scattered on it that would be easy to pick off if you didn't want them. If you have a picky person in your party that intends to rely on pizza for their meals, please reconsider - it really isn't even like the Neapolitan pizza I've had here. They didn't have peanut butter out anywhere but they had it available. They had a grill section for burgers and hot dogs (I didn't get a close look, so not sure what else might be there but I didn't see chicken nuggets). They had lots of salad fixings and pasta salad and fruit and a rotisserie chicken station. A wide variety of tasty bread and rolls and real butter. Desserts were usually small - two bites - pieces of cake in different flavors, not necessarily plain chocolate or vanilla.
The chocolate place served an absolutely divine hot chocolate with whipped cream, and the gelato was stellar, but they are extra. Budget for them, both in cash and calories.
My husband gained two pounds even though he mostly lounged around and he ate constantly. I'm sure it's possible to gain a lot more but the smaller portion sizes and dearth of heavy sauces and fried food definitely helped. Neither of us felt deprived at all.
So TL;DR: MDR food was fine, specialty restaurants better and worth the package prices, but picky eaters or fried-food lovers may not be happy with food options.

I just moved to the middle of SF. I've been to Ocean and China beach but I was curious if there are any warmer or less windy beaches like a 1-2 hour drive outside the city? Thinking it would be nice to have a beach day outside the city one of these weekends. Any Suggestions?

🌺🌴🎈 today is Funday!
🌺Today is the day to post FUN pics. Read below for further guidelines for Monday and other days of the week. Thanks.
TAKE NOTE, please! 🎈FUN DAY on MONDAY.🎈
Fun pics: Please keep in mind: - Keep it light. No dark themes or sexy pics… This is for fun and to get to know each other a bit, to post those favorite pics that don’t usually fit our description such as pets, babies, houses, your latest hobby project, unusual dishes, fantasy, made to look unnatural, etc… - Original pics, please. You may still post a couple of “regular” pics as well.

• Only on Mondays, a max of two fun posts. (You can put more than one pic on a post.) We’ll have to remove and ask you to repost on Monday if you forget and post fun pics on other days.
  
• As far as time zones, just post when it’s Monday for you. - Keep it respectful, kind and comfortable. - Use the new flair for fun posts, other flairs for regular posts.
  

🌲 OTHER DAYS OF THE WEEK: Please follow our regular guidelines. Please submit original content and use the flair. Thanks.
For all days: landscapes, waterscapes (ocean, river, lake, waterfalls etc), flowers, wildlife. (No, not you on a nude beach… that might go on a different sub, not our thing.) **Avoid signs of Civilization and its chaos and noise, this is a retreat from all of that. So - avoid all those buildings, houses, vehicles, pets, etc. (You can use them on a fun post.)

• Any questions, please ask. We’ll be refining the structure if need be. - Hope you enjoy it! ~ Your MODS

Last ditch effort, but I lost an engagement ring in Ocean Beach, maybe somewhere around Azucar on Newport Ave. It has a gold band with a blue stone, 2 tiny diamonds on either side. Would be so, so grateful if it turns up.

From an article in today's Guardian, addressed to visitors to Cornwall:

So, you’re thinking of coming to Cornwall. . . . But what do you really know about this seemingly perfect, picture-postcard holiday destination?
For example, have you ever wondered where the local people live? . . . If you talk to the local people – the ones who serve you in the fancy fish restaurants or who clean your bed linen and come out to your rental on a Sunday night to help with the sticky front door – they will tell you that they have been priced out of their own towns.
The tourism industry, particularly in rural and coastal areas, is heavily reliant on healthy ecosystems. They bring a range of benefits, not least food, water and natural beauty for visitors and local people alike. However, tourists can threaten the quality of the local environment, and overtourism is a growing concern, bringing traffic, parking issues, pollution and litter. . . . The recent sharp growth in the sector has led to strain on infrastructure – including hospitals, [emergency services] and other local services – while unregulated rentals have meant unaffordable housing for residents.
So what can those visiting Cornwall do to counteract this? You could start by visiting beaches that don’t feature in the usual guidebooks. . . . Visitors can also protect the nature around them and contribute to its restoration by getting involved in nature-based activities and conservation . . . And try not to be rude to local people. If you’ve been asked to not drink from a glass bottle on the beach, there is a reason for that. Don’t forget to tip waiting staff. They are probably on minimum wage, and tipping is an easy way to support the local economy.
Don’t park wherever you like, especially on the beach! When taking to the coastal path, please don’t run or cycle; it speeds up erosion and is also incredibly dangerous. Don’t forget to take your rubbish away with you: many beaches, especially secluded ones, don’t have bins, so that bag full of waste and those disposable barbecues that you stack neatly against the cliff will end up in the sea, harming wildlife.
Please don’t buy a second home! If you do, and leave it empty for most of the year, you’re likely to get angry local people making their feelings known. And don’t do a mass Airbnb booking: there’s a housing crisis in Cornwall, and the unregulated accommodation option is putting pressure on housing and pricing local people out of the market. You could always book [camping/RV sites] or rooms in hotels.
Cornwall doesn’t stop being beautiful on the last day of August; it is incredibly beautiful all year round. Our winters are milder than the rest of the country and fewer people visit then, so holidaying then would definitely be less manic, and nothing beats a walk on a wet and windy beach. Everyone in Cornwall knows that the real summer starts in September – perfect for those who are not tied to school holidays. We locals know best, join us!

Much of what is mentioned in the article can apply to issues caused by overtourism here on the Coast - and, I suspect, in other parts of Oregon where short-term rentals have caused not only overtourism and environmental damage, but also a housing crisis that starves essential services as well as private sector businesses of needed workers.
I'd be curious to know what others on this sub who live in these areas might think of what the author recommends to visitors - as well as what you might add to these recommendations for those visiting your area.
Here's mine:
Those of you who are visiting the area - especially those who are here for the first time - whenever you are tootling along the local roads, enjoying the scenery, please keep in mind that those who live and work here have no choice but to use the same roads to conduct their day-to-day lives, including getting to and from work. Yes, they allow a lot of extra time for traffic during tourist season - but, from what many essential workers I've talked to have told me, there's invariably some derp who is so clueless on the road that they make everybody else look like Mario Andretti.
If you are making your leisurely way along a road with which you're not familiar, and you slow way down for curves, and if you notice a car coming up behind you - probably one that's a whole lot less nice than the one you're driving - be considerate and, at the first opportunity, PULL OVER and let this person pass. Don't speed up as soon as you hit a straightaway where they can pass you. This driver is likely a local who may end up serving the lunch you plan to stop for in a few hours - or, worse yet, they may be an emergency response worker who comes to help you if you get into an accident - and you may very well be making them late.
Also, I second the advice not to use AirBnBs, but I've made that recommendation so many times on this sub that I'm starting to feel like a broken record.
Any other "locals" - whether on the Coast, in the Cascades or another heavily-touristed part of the state - want to chime in here?

SO LIKE I BROUGHT MY HOME DAWG TO THE BEACH
and like it’s beautiful
Sun’s out but keeping it at 70F
Neither me or my amigo like water
Like you won’t find us at the pool but we loveee walking everywhere so ofc I have to take ‘em along with me to the beach
We finally get to see ALL THE HOT DOGS WITH THEIR FAMILIES LIKE WHAAATTTT
The smile on our faces that day lolll
Our momma doesn’t wanna go into the ocean by herself when the entire beach is crowded so I’m like
No thx I’m working on a sand hole for my butt
And she’s like
Okay well im just take the dog to the water
And my padre and me are like nooo he hatesss the water ever since his entire life
And she’s like okay lol whatever we’re going in anyway
Padre says hey go with them that dog’s gonna run away from the water
And I’m like okay let back up my buddy
So I’m catching up behind them and I get to the water and I SEE NON OTHER THAN THIS DAWG ACTUALLY ENJOYING THE WATER???? LIKE HUHHH?????
and like bro this MUST BE a completely different dog
BUT NO HE’S BITING EACH WAVE
HE’S LETTING US SPLASH EM WITH WATER
we’re heading back to our spot on the beach and YOUR BOY STARTS RUBBUNG HIMSELF IN THE SAND???? I FR LIKE I STOLE SOMEONES DOG
later at home I go to wash him up and IT’S THE BEST QUALITY BATH IVE EVER GIVEN HIM
SUPER MORE CHILL COMPARED TO EVERY OTHER BATH
HE LOVES THE WATER NOW
I WAS ACTUALLY ABLE TO FIND ON THE FLEAS ON HIM
THAT NEVERRRRR HAPPENSSS
I’m so impressed he’s earned himself treats and a night on bed!!!
(Like every other night lol)

Welcome to HamptonRoadsVAHousing! Our subreddit gets a lot of questions about relocating to the area, so be sure to search the subreddit to see if your specific questions have already been answered.
Here's a quick list of the top tips and most frequently repeated advice about moving to the Norfolk/Virginia Beach area:
Live on the same side of the water as you work. Our many bridges, tunnels and bridge-tunnels frequently experience heavy traffic volume and become chokepoints even on days without incidents or accidents. Commuting from the Southside (Norfolk/Virginia Beach) to the Peninsula (Hampton, Newport News, Williamsburg) and vice versa is not recommended. Additionally, many water crossings are now or will eventually be tolled. Get an EZ-Pass to pay the lowest rate.
This area floods. Look at FEMA flood maps for the area you want to move to and be aware of possibly needing flood insurance. Similarly, our area occasionally experiences hurricanes. Know your Evacuation Zone and learn more about Hurricane Preparations. Hampton Roads has a lot to offer. Obviously there is the beach. But there is also a surprisingly good and growing food & craft beer scene. A great many museums and activities. And an easy drive to the mountains and other major cities. Career wise the medical center is growing year over year, and is only expected to continue expanding into a major hub for the region. Norfolk offers a slightly more urban feel, with lots of great food joints and cultural amenities, all while being walking and bike friendly. Virginia Beach is more suburban in feel, and has a large amount of great neighborhoods at a decent price not too far from the beach. Chesapeake is even more suburban, but more affordable. Suffolk is growing, but still by all rights could be considered mostly rural. (credit to u/Here4thebeer3232)
Check crime reports. Crime can happen anywhere but some areas see more reported incidents than others. Great areas can be adjacent to bad neighborhoods, sometimes separated only by a road or a few blocks. When buying or renting a residence, try to visit the area at different times of day and strike up conversations with locals to get a feel for the location. Use Norfolk's Crime Mapping tool to view crime reports and statistics.
Norfolk Neighborhoods of Note
Chelsea/West Ghent: Small former industrial area that is now home to 2 top tier Breweries and is a central part of the Elizabeth River Bike Trail. Has a growing culinary scene. Limited residential options.
Colonial Place: Upscale residential neighborhood with waterside access. Flooding is a concern in this area, but neighborhoods are family friendly and homes are gorgeous.
Downtown: the urban center of our region. Growing residential population to match established barestaurant, entertainment and financial scenes.
East Beach: Newly constructed high end beach condos right on the Chesapeake Bay. Has abundant docking for boats, fishing holes, and beach access. A more quiet and older community.
Fort Norfolk: Growing area adjacent to EVMS and Sentara Medical Center. The unofficial midtown of Norfolk, that is slowly becoming a part of the city skyline. Floods often.
Freemason: straight-laced & upscale enclave adjacent to downtown and built around cobblestone streets.
Ghent: trendy, historic and filled to the brim with character, culture and delicious cuisine. The neighborhood’s main thoroughfare, Colley Avenue, and adjacent 21st and 22nd streets are lined with eclectic eateries, unique shops, art galleries and antique stores.
Larchmont: High end homes in a family friendly neighborhood. Adjacent to ODU, but without the noise, Larchmont is home to incredible homes in a very green and quiet part of the city. Also has waterside access. Oceanview: Affordable community right on the beach. Still considered more working class, it is slowly looking to compete with the Virginia Beach Oceanfront as a tourist attraction. Home to the Bold Mariner Brewery and Jessy's Taqueria
NEON District: Growing Arts district, adjacent to downtown. Home to a variety of arts shops and artisan restaurants, as well as the Chrysler Museum of Art and the Harrison Opera house.
Park Place: Park Place is a historic neighborhood centrally located to the north of Downtown Norfolk. Park Place offers multimodal access to health and fitness facilities, dining, coffee shops, retail, visual art, live music, and community for people from all walks of life. This historic residential neighborhood is a diverse and inclusive community, and is comprised of a mix of single detached houses, condos, luxury, market rate, and affordable rentals homes and apartments. Located between 23rd street and 38th street, and between Granby street on the east, and Colley ave on the west, the Park Place area neighborhood includes two business districts, the 35th Street Business District and the Railroad District, and is walkable to the North Colley, Ghent, and Riverview business districts.
Railroad District: Rapidly growing former warehouse district located between Ghent and Park place. Home to the majority of Breweries in the city. While could be considered gentrified, is still home to novel cultural centers such as 757 Makerspace and Nomads Clothing Exchange.
Riverview: Immediately adjacent to the Norfolk Zoo and
Lafayette park. With waterside access and a small commercial corridor, Riverview is a good area for all ages. Also home to MJs Tavern, the largest LGBT bar in the metropolitan area.
St Paul's District: Under construction
West Ocean View: Turns into a parking lot for HRBT traffic every time the base lets out.
Willoughby Spit: Quiet residential sandbar. Remains somewhat isolated from HRBT traffic, but offers a commanding presence along the Chesapeake Bay.
VirginiaBeach Neighborhoods of Note
Chesapeake/Chic's Beach: "locals only" beachside community.
Oceanfront: touristy stretch of beach + boardwalk, hotels, and trinket shops.
Town Center: VB's Central Business District including Pembroke Mall and other high-end shopping, dining, and entertainment.

21/5/23

• Wuzz refuses to explain his lore to Sirin (and the audience), making Sirin (and the audience) displeased with him.
• Hecate hatches a plan to marry someone and then divorce them to get child support money.
• Demo gets amnesia.
• Zera formally adopts Sirin.
• Sirin finds Wuzz’s cursed notebook.
• Hoshino takes a potion that makes him extroverted, and along with Kita, almost burn the entire world down.
• Bocchi starts ripping and tearing her way through hell.
• Hoshino gets caught cheating at the casino again while on a date with Ruby.
• Zera nukes the Arby’s half of the Librarby’s and replaces it with a Chick-Fil-A.

22/5/23

• PADORU TAKEOVER
• Zera, Kita, Yatta, Kana Arima, Sirin, and Bocchi become padorufied.
• Using Sanji’s cooking, Zera is cured. With the power of love, Bocchi and Kita get cured (Also BoKita real again)
• Zera buys a plastic tree at the Padoru store.
• Kazoo (Kaz x Demo) dies.
• In an attempt to bring back Demo’s memory, Kaz goes insane, almost gexes a book, and then becomes aware of the fourth wall (he can hear our out of character voices what the fuck what the fuck WHAT THE FUCK)
• Mryo undergoes an amnesia arc.
• Grima opens up a steakhouse, and Zera applies to work there and is accepted.
• Makoto finds the book that Kaz almost gexed, and checks it out.
• Zera gives Wuzz a replica of himself that isn’t sentient and is slightly weaker.

23/5/23

• It was all a dream
• jk
• a zombie invasion begins, Zera resolves the situation by giving the zombies toast in exchange for them leaving.
• The remnants of Demo fuse with Kaz, and Demo can now occasionally control Kaz, and is living rent free inside of his head. Literally.
• Mryo ends her amnesia arc by being bonked.
• Sirin and Wuzz have a practice fight, and seriously injure each other, with Sirin accidentally summoning god, who tries to kill Wuzz.
• Zera fights god in order to keep Wuzz from being murdered.
• Rupert becomes Emiya during the zombie invasion.
• Army Recruiter Bocchi sucks bad at aiming.
• God went MIA after being exploded with an IED.
• Cynthia from pokemon arrives at the office.
• Hoshino, Ruby, and Kana go on a beach date, and might have skin cancer now.
• Okita returns home to Chaldea.
• The mysterious heroine X appears in the office.
• Hoshino cooks more kitaura potions.
• Cook Bocchi and Yamada Ryo get sucked into the backrooms, aka Mirai’s stomach.
• Megumin from Konosuba appears.
• Freddy Fazbear appears, and immediately murders Megumin.
• Nobu learns of Okita’s departure.

24/5/23

• Zera adds a research lab and a music practice room to the office.
• Fredbear’s family diner opens up in Shimokitazawa.
• Zera, Kira, Megumin, and Padoru form “The Explosion Gang”, a group of explosion enjoyers.
• 3 Holy Grails appear in shimokitazawa: One is given to Robin, one is taken by X, and one is taken by Kiana.
• Zera recruits Freddy Fazbear into his idol group to replace Ingrid, who vanished, and Mryo, who can no longer possess objects.
• Zera adds Nobu to the Explosion Gang.
• Kita, Ryo, and Nobu are exposed to the horrors of Wuzz’s notebook.
• Kiana watches the oshi no ko anime and reads the manga.
• Hecate is added to the explosion gang by the Padorus.

25/5/23

• Fate lore dump by Rupert to Kaz
• Kaz and Hecate build the lego death star together.
• Bocchi and Kita get chased by zombies and freddy fazbear.
• Emiya joins in to help fight off freddy fazbear, but gets sent to brazil. Using a projection of Zera, he snipes freddy from brazil.
• Og Wuzz orders body pillows of kessoku band and frames Wuzz.
• Zera learns souls count as a form of energy, and threatens to absorb og wuzz if he doesn’t behave.
• Matpat appears, and duels Freddy. Later, scott cawthon and markiplier get involved.
• Ryo digs through the office sofa, and finds body pillows of Ryo, Bocchi, Ruby, Kana, and Wuzz.
• Zera nukes the office sofa at Gil’s request.
• Office shootout.
• Akane Kurokawa arrives at the office.
• Hecate (Yatta) lore, Hecate is actually a third child of Ai Hoshino with amnesia. Hecate assumes her true form, but in the process loses her sentience powers.
• Zera offers Hecate a spot in his idol group along with Freddy Fazbear.
• Hecate goes on a date with Nobu.
• Makoto gets hired as a night guard to Fredbear’s family diner and at Shimobucks.
• Zera and Makoto investigate Kotone, the book with the list of survivors.
• Zera comes to the conclusion that all of the characters on the “survivor list” were characters who woke up in shimokitazawa without any memory of how they got there from their original world.
• Kiana opens a cat cafe.
• Robin opens a seafood restaurant, and Zera becomes an employee there.
• While on a date with Ruby at the new seafood restaurant, Hoshino gets attacked by the Virals, managing to escape by abusing his warp spell.
• Steel gets trashed in a fight against Bill Clinton, and narrowly loses in a fight against Abraham Lincoln.

27/5/23

• Demo reveals she is currently posessing Kaz to Zera and Rupert.
• Water fight in the office.
• Hecate formally decides to join Unlimited Blade Works, Zera’s idol group.
• While possessing Kaz, Demo decides to become a terrorist.
• Hecate and Nobu go on a karaoke date, which is crashed by Rupert, Zera, and Kita.
• Raiden Mei appears in the office, and reunites with Kiana. Hoo boy, this is gonna be awkward.
• Bocchi has a heated moment of gamer rage while playing splatoon with Ryo.
• Naoki, Zera, Toad, and Kita smash each other (in super smash brothers).
• A bullet train arrives at the office, intent on running over happy couples (nonlethally).
• A-Train from the boys arrives at the office, intent on running over happy couples (nonlethally).
• Zera recruits the bullet train into Unlimited Blade Works.
• Unlimited Blade Works will be performing next Saturday along with Ai Hoshino, Hoshino Ai, Kessoku Band, and B-Komachi.
• Ruby becomes scummy after an encounter with a crow.
• Wuzz is revealed to have 4 days left to live due to a curse.
• After consulting with Zera, Wuzz manages to delay his curse-induced death to 30 days.
• Wuzz asks Zera’s permission to marry Sirin, and he agrees.
• Ruby gets unscummified because of her love for Hoshino.
• Wuzz gets ratio’d on isstagram.
• A rare actually wholesome moment of the office members just vibing on isstagram.

27/5/23

• Kaz and Demo separate (not divorced, they’re just in two bodies again)
• Wholesome selfie in the office :kitaletsgoooooooooo:
• Rupert cooka da pizza
• Real Nocate date
• The therapy office is balling, now.

28/5/23

• Hecate tames the divine beasts and turns them into tourist attractions and shops.
• Nijika’s birthday! Everyone gives her gifts.
• Angel Nijika descends from heaven for her birthday.
• Zera goes out to get milk.
• Zera comes back with the milk.
• Thunderblight ganon spawns in the office as a static boss encounter. Throughout the day, Rupert, Zera, Kaz, and Nux fight and defeat it, each gaining Urbosa’s fury.
• Kiana plays fnaf while Zera, Kotone, Ryo, Bocchi, Bocchi, Bocchi, and Nijika watch.

I was born in the naval base in Rota, so I've always wanted to check this off of my bucket list ever since I was a little boy. I plan on flying in to Jerez on a Tue and staying in a hotel in Old Town Cadiz most of that day recovering from the flight and then Wed-Sat seeing the town and then flying out on Sun.
I am choosing next spring, either April or May, after carnival in Feb and before the summer rush when a lot of Spaniards trek to the ocean and beaches. Are there any places to visit you can suggest? What's the avg price for lunch and dinner in Euros? (I usually skip breakfast). Any hotels in Old Town Cadiz you can recommend? Would a train ride to Seville be worth it on one of the days I am in town, or should I just spend the entire time in Cadiz?
Thank you.

This might end up being fairly long and if so I apologize in advance but I hope this ends up being as cathartic as I’m hoping.
Let’s start at the beginning. I wasn’t a good husband... hell I probably wasn't even a good person. I was selfish, inattentive to her needs, hid a painkiller addiction for many years and a copious amount of other issues. I wasn’t perfect though neither was she. We were happy though and together for a decade. I’ll preface this by saying that I’m the most non-jealous person in the world. I don’t care what you do with your friends, where you do it, and when as long as your honest. For example let’s say one of her friends invited her to go out of town or to do something for a weekend, it was like “hey are we doing anything this weekend? No? Okay I’m gonna go out of town with insert name here” and vice versa for me “hey are we doing anything this weekend? No? Okay I’m gonna go hunting with insert name here”. All that being said, again, not jealous AT ALL, but after the divorce and subsequent relationship I think my trust with SO coworkers is irreparably damaged.
His name was Joe, I heard through some of her other coworker friends he had a crush on my wife. Whatever, she got cheated on with her first love and couldn’t even watch movies or shows where someone cheats it would make her so angry. So I never thought twice about her going out with her coworkers. Now again, let me say I was not a good husband towards the end, and it took a long time and a lot of hurt and anger had to be let go to where I finally realized that I don’t fault her for finding solace in the arms of another, because she was a damn good wife, a damn good mother, and an even better husband. And she deserved better. I relapsed after an incredibly awful start to 2018. I went and stayed at my moms and had to go over to the house to get some things. Her and my daughter were gone somewhere but her Apple Watch was there. My gut told me what I already knew, and what I knew was that I shouldn't look through it knowing what I would find. What did I find? That she was filing for divorce the next week and plenty of messages to Joe. I knew it was only a matter of time before they ended up together. Can you guess what happened? I had a decent amount of money saved up so I took a sabbatical from work that ended extending to almost two years
December 2018, Christmas morning. I had a plan, it was foolproof. I was going to facetime my daughter in the morning to tell her how much I loved her and missed her and had a very merry Christmas... and then I was going to go in my backyard and blow my brains out. So thats what I did. I called her, talked to her as best you can to a three year old in the midst of a post present high with her cousins there too. Then I walked out in my backyard with my favorite rifle and sat there. And sat there. And sat there. For six hours. I cried, I wept... I wept for me, for my kid who was going to grow up without her daddy. I wept for my ex-wife who was going to have to explain to my daughter why she wouldn't be able to see her daddy again. I wept for my family and the pain I was about to cause them I begged and screamed to God. That if they were real and I was meant for things in this life that they would show me a fucking sign. Show me ANYTHING that would show me whether this drastic choice would be the right one... or the wrong. For six hours in the freezing cold. Never did get an answer that I could recognize as one. But the thought of my kid calling the person my wife had AT LEAST an emotional affair with, "Dad" made me sick... and made me want to live.
I decided to check into rehab, not for drugs, but so I didn't kill myself. Ive always kind of been a natural leader. I don't know why or what it is about me but people tend to flock towards me and have really either one or two reactions. They either really like me, or they really fucking hate me. Here though everyone really liked me and I was put in charge of running the meetings held there and trying to keep morale of the folks there. And it was a great fucking time. It was a month vacation in a really nice area of the state, I didn't have a phone, only my guitar and the resolve to work through my emotions in a safe place the best way I know how, by writing songs about it. Which is exactly what I did both in the classes, AA Meetings, out of class, didn't matter I was just knocking out song after song. I met a kid in there with a killer voice and a guy around my age who actually was the lead singesongwriter for a local band I was a fan of so it ended up being a really enjoyable experience.. The kid though... he got murdered last year from a drug deal gone wrong. Shot in a car and left to die in the parking lot. I think about him almost every day.
What did I learn? I learned that I shouldn't go looking for things I don't want to find, or ask questions that I really want the true answer to. Or so I thought.
I met K in December 2020 on Hinge. I wasn't sure I was really over my ex wife but then when we met it was love at first sight. And for a guy that didn't think he was ever going to love anyone again it was a major deal. She felt the same it seemed, though I now realize it was probably more of a trauma bond/rebound type situation. Things went really well for the honeymoon phase, it was like we couldn't get enough of each other. She was a cheer coach/art teacher, it was new, it was exciting, the sex was great.. she was great... She had some pretty serious insecurities and abandonment issues though. Her mom dropped her off with what ended up being her adoptive family only to come back a few years later and take her away for a few months, then bring her back and drop her off again. She self sabotages and destroys anything good in her life for fear or being hurt and left by someone again. And she only dated guys that controlled her, treated her like shit, stole from her, etc etc. She took xanax and ambien which when it would kick in at first it seemed she was still cognizant. One night when I was staying over there she had taken it and asked me to look something up in her phone. As soon as I open it I see a text to a coach at the school she taught at that was just really inappropriate shit that made me feel uncomfortable, especially since he was married. I asked her about it when she off work the next day and she just downplayed it as they are wont to do. I let it go but its something I thought of often, especially after it ended.
We moved in together in August of 21. I helped her get a job at a school over on my side of town so we got a really nice apartment close to her work and not far from mine. Thats when things started to change. I'll never forget we were laying in bed on a Friday afternoon, I was about to go pick up my kid. I rolled over towards her side and propped myself up and looked at her for a second and thought how lucky am I, and so thats what I said out loud to her. Its like she recoiled like she got bit by a snake, bolted out of bed and said I was being clingy and essentially ran out the door where she ended up back on the other side of town and had dinner with a gay guy friend. I really didn't know what to do or how to take it so when I picked my kid up I took her over to my moms house and we stayed there until K called and asked me to come home so we could talk. I left my kid with my mom and went over there and she apologized and reiterated how she feels in relationships, the fear of being left, how independent she had to be because of her upbringing and a few other things.
Not long after that she forwarded me an email, I'm not even sure what she meant to send me if she even meant it to send to me because I never got around to asking. It was an email thread with the coach where she said "guess what?", "What? You're gonna have my baby?" "No I got Covid!". I confronted her about it, told her how it made me feel, and while she never really responded to it in a way that made me worry I still strongly disliked it and let her know that. Not long after that as we were laying in bed I saw she was texting someone exceptionally long paragraphs, you know the type, the type when you're first talking to someone and are explaining things about yourself to them? I'll spare the long part but come to find out shes found a new coach to have what appears to be an emotional affair with. Though come to find out this one ended up being physical. She broke up with me in January 22. Told me while I showed her love in a way she didn't know was possible, and treated her in a way nobody had ever treated her before that I was too good for her and deserved better. I tried to change her mind, lord knows I tried, I was madly in love. My kid was in love with her. We talked about a future I never thought possible after my divorce.
I moved out of the apartment and back to my moms until I could find a place. We talked occasionally and I spent so much time reading this sub and others. Posts about how to get her back, how to make her miss me, what to do and what not to do. When my work sabbatical ended I got my old job back. Its a great job, ridiculously easy and the amount of work I actually do compared to my compensation should be illegal. She lost her cheer stipend when we moved back to my side of town since she didn't coach and since we got the apt together I knew what her funds looked like. We got that place because we could afford it together, alone I knew she was going to struggle. And I still wanted her back... what better way to show her that and try to manifest it by just being there for her when she needed me? Little did I know that would be the only time she asked me anything. Only when she needed help, or was having an anxiety attack and needed someone to talk her off the ledge and tell her everything was going to be okay. It was never her asking how I was doing, or my kid, or my dog, or what was going on in my life. Everyone told me what my gut had already told me but I lied to myself over and over. Not long after all this happened I found out she had been seeing the new coach at the new school though she still won't admit it even up to... checks notes today.
March 23 I get my first really big commission check I gave her 10k and we paid off her credit card, some other debt she had, some missed car payments and other bill help. Not long after that she tells me shes going to a cabin nearby where shes from with her sisters and nieces/nephews and asks me to watch her dog which I miss just as much as her so I do it. Mind you previous to this we went through a rough spot and she had blocked me on IG and never unblocked me. One of my cousins still followed her though, she hits me on snapchat saying "oh wow K looks amazing" I say "Oh yeah, does the cabin look nice?" She said "Cabin? Looks like shes at the beach" and sends me a screenshot of her IG post. I do my best FBI investigation and zoom in on her glasses, it appears to be a guy taking the picture based on the reflection from the frames and I kind of have an idea who I think it could be, come to find out, we'll call him JMJ also happens to be in Florida at the same time. So I call her out and tell her she needs to find someone to come get her dog and I'm done with her and her lies. She tells me "Oh my mom and dad are traveling across the country in their RV (WHICH THEY WERE) and so when you sent me that extra money after we paid the bills my sister and I decided to fly to Florida to spend some time with them on Spring Break"
She then breaks down and tells me how shes ruined the relationship with the last genuine person in her life and that when she gets back she'll get her dog and I'll never hear from her again. Master manipulator and while shes an amazing liar to someone who wants with every fiber of his being to believe him, is awful at hiding her lies. What do I do? Well I'm a fucking idiot so you can already imagine what I did. I begged her for once to just be honest with me. For once in our entire two years going back and forth that if she ever did truly love me or respect me for things I did for her that she would be honest. She told shes not dating anyone and doesn't have a boyfriend and that nothing has changed. I told her that even if she was seeing someone and told me about it I would help her out one last time only because I had committed to it. I told myself I was doing it for altruistic reasons, that because of all her issues that if I can do for her what I said I would do for her and that would help her out in her future relationships to show her that not everybody is it out to just fuck her and leave her, that when some people tell you they'll do something for you they mean it and she stops self sabotaging then I did my part.
A couple weeks ago was her 30th birthday. I see if she wants to grab dinner but she says one of her girl teacher friends is taking her to dinner in the galleria area. Check the guys IG story via an anonymous viewer and guess who happens to be at a restaurant in the galleria area? I don't even call her out because at this point Im making a plan. I get another rather large check in July and so we had previously talked about paying off the rest of her debt. She tells me shes going to her parents house for MDW and then that shes going out of town today with one of her old friends to New Orleans. This is when I realize just whats about to happen. Im about to have the answer to the question I thought I was dying to know the answer to. I told myself if he posts an IG story today where hes traveling, there is 0% chance that shes not with him. The first thing I see when I open IG is he posted a story... in Cancun. Then the next picture I see... her phone on the table next to him. Bingo. Send her an email saying "Hey I hope you have fun in Cancun!" and that was it. Almost immediately she texts me asking how I know and figured it out and I just saw red. I immediately opened up IG and sent him a message with texts, receipts, bank transfers, her telling me that she still loves me and we can go take a trip this summer, how many times shes asked me for money and help and the lies shes told me about him. She asks me to stop messaging him and I say that shes forever lost the option to ask ANYTHING of me but realize what Im doing is not the right thing and is hella immature so I send her another email saying I'm sorry and out of respect for her I wont say anything else to him.
Then he sends me a message on IG asking to elaborate more and then told me she told him I owed her a lot of money... I asked how much and for what and he said $2k for bills when we first got together. Thats when I sent him an entire list of all bank transactions through our bank and Apple Pay. Just digital alone, $18.647.00 over the last six months plus another $12,460.00 in cash over the last eight months. Then I realized just how little better this made me feel. In fact I thought I would feel triumphant, and ready to move on and finally be over her and start to heal. Knowing full damn and well keeping her around and helping her was keeping me from being able to heal and move on. I sent her another message telling her I was taking the last part of her birthday gift to her apartment and leaving it in the ottoman outside her door and that because I had already accounted for and mentally prepared for giving her money in July that I still would then I blocked and removed her from IG and anything else that would open up an avenue for contact.
Here we are. Starting NC again... a year and a half after we broke up all because I thought I needed the answers to what I didn't want to find out or know. And that yet again, my gut has yet to lie to me in regards to relationships. What is wrong with me? Why even after all of this do I still want her in my life and want her back? If she called me tomorrow needing help I'd probably still do it. How do I fix myself? I've gotten an entire new wardrobe, an entire home gym so I quit blaming my depression for why I didn't go to the gym, and have tried really hard to focus on myself yet I know deep down everything I'm doing, I'm still doing for hopes of her. I lied to myself and clouded my own gut and mind to listen to my heart when I knew what I already knew yet still felt the need to confirm it.
Its not worth it. IT. IS.NOT. WORTH. IT. Keep that door closed if you don't want to know whats on the other side. Don't open that book if you don't want to see whats written on that last page. If your gut is telling you something, its probably right. Listen to it. When your friends and family are telling you the same thing your gut is telling you, listen to them. Even if its killing you, even if its the last thing you want to do, even if its going to break your heart again and reopen any wounds for you to bleed out again it has to be done. Don't be like me. Don't prolong your suffering for a year and a half for hope that you know isn't going to shake out in your way regardless of what the other person might be telling you.

This might end up being fairly long and if so I apologize in advance but I hope this ends up being as cathartic as I’m hoping.
Let’s start at the beginning. I wasn’t a good husband... hell I probably wasn't even a good person. I was selfish, inattentive to her needs, hid a painkiller addiction for many years and a copious amount of other issues. I wasn’t perfect though neither was she. We were happy though and together for a decade. I’ll preface this by saying that I’m the most non-jealous person in the world. I don’t care what you do with your friends, where you do it, and when as long as your honest. For example let’s say one of her friends invited her to go out of town or to do something for a weekend, it was like “hey are we doing anything this weekend? No? Okay I’m gonna go out of town with insert name here” and vice versa for me “hey are we doing anything this weekend? No? Okay I’m gonna go hunting with insert name here”. All that being said, again, not jealous AT ALL, but after the divorce and subsequent relationship I think my trust with SO coworkers is irreparably damaged.
His name was Joe, I heard through some of her other coworker friends he had a crush on my wife. Whatever, she got cheated on with her first love and couldn’t even watch movies or shows where someone cheats it would make her so angry. So I never thought twice about her going out with her coworkers. Now again, let me say I was not a good husband towards the end, and it took a long time and a lot of hurt and anger had to be let go to where I finally realized that I don’t fault her for finding solace in the arms of another, because she was a damn good wife, a damn good mother, and an even better person. And she deserved better. I relapsed after an incredibly awful start to 2018. I went and stayed at my moms and had to go over to the house to get some things. Her and my daughter were gone somewhere but her Apple Watch was there. My gut told me what I already knew, and what I knew was that I shouldn't look through it knowing what I would find. What did I find? That she was filing for divorce the next week and plenty of messages to Joe. I knew it was only a matter of time before they ended up together. Can you guess what happened? I had a decent amount of money saved up so I took a sabbatical from work that ended extending to almost two years
December 2018, Christmas morning. I had a plan, it was foolproof. I was going to facetime my daughter in the morning to tell her how much I loved her and missed her and had a very merry Christmas... and then I was going to go in my backyard and blow my brains out. So thats what I did. I called her, talked to her as best you can to a three year old in the midst of a post present high with her cousins there too. Then I walked out in my backyard with my favorite rifle and sat there. And sat there. And sat there. For six hours. I cried, I wept... I wept for me, for my kid who was going to grow up without her daddy. I wept for my ex-wife who was going to have to explain to my daughter why she wouldn't be able to see her daddy again. I wept for my family and the pain I was about to cause them I begged and screamed to God. That if they were real and I was meant for things in this life that they would show me a fucking sign. Show me ANYTHING that would show me whether this drastic choice would be the right one... or the wrong. For six hours in the freezing cold. Never did get an answer that I could recognize as one. But the thought of my kid calling the person my wife had AT LEAST an emotional affair with, "Dad" made me sick... and made me want to live.
I decided to check into rehab, not for drugs, but so I didn't kill myself. Ive always kind of been a natural leader. I don't know why or what it is about me but people tend to flock towards me and have really either one or two reactions. They either really like me, or they really fucking hate me. Here though everyone really liked me and I was put in charge of running the meetings held there and trying to keep morale of the folks there. And it was a great fucking time. It was a month vacation in a really nice area of the state, I didn't have a phone, only my guitar and the resolve to work through my emotions in a safe place the best way I know how, by writing songs about it. Which is exactly what I did both in the classes, AA Meetings, out of class, didn't matter I was just knocking out song after song. I met a kid in there with a killer voice and a guy around my age who actually was the lead singesongwriter for a local band I was a fan of so it ended up being a really enjoyable experience.. The kid though... he got murdered last year from a drug deal gone wrong. Shot in a car and left to die in the parking lot. I think about him almost every day.
What did I learn? I learned that I shouldn't go looking for things I don't want to find, or ask questions that I really want the true answer to. Or so I thought.
I met K in December 2020 on Hinge. I wasn't sure I was really over my ex wife but then when we met it was love at first sight. And for a guy that didn't think he was ever going to love anyone again it was a major deal. She felt the same it seemed, though I now realize it was probably more of a trauma bond/rebound type situation. Things went really well for the honeymoon phase, it was like we couldn't get enough of each other. She was a cheer coach/art teacher, it was new, it was exciting, the sex was great.. she was great... She had some pretty serious insecurities and abandonment issues though. Her mom dropped her off with what ended up being her adoptive family only to come back a few years later and take her away for a few months, then bring her back and drop her off again. She self sabotages and destroys anything good in her life for fear or being hurt and left by someone again. And she only dated guys that controlled her, treated her like shit, stole from her, etc etc. She took xanax and ambien which when it would kick in at first it seemed she was still cognizant. One night when I was staying over there she had taken it and asked me to look something up in her phone. As soon as I open it I see a text to a coach at the school she taught at that was just really inappropriate shit that made me feel uncomfortable, especially since he was married. I asked her about it when she off work the next day and she just downplayed it as they are wont to do. I let it go but its something I thought of often, especially after it ended.
We moved in together in August of 21. I helped her get a job at a school over on my side of town so we got a really nice apartment close to her work and not far from mine. Thats when things started to change. I'll never forget we were laying in bed on a Friday afternoon, I was about to go pick up my kid. I rolled over towards her side and propped myself up and looked at her for a second and thought how lucky am I, and so thats what I said out loud to her. Its like she recoiled like she got bit by a snake, bolted out of bed and said I was being clingy and essentially ran out the door where she ended up back on the other side of town and had dinner with a gay guy friend. I really didn't know what to do or how to take it so when I picked my kid up I took her over to my moms house and we stayed there until K called and asked me to come home so we could talk. I left my kid with my mom and went over there and she apologized and reiterated how she feels in relationships, the fear of being left, how independent she had to be because of her upbringing and a few other things.
Not long after that she forwarded me an email, I'm not even sure what she meant to send me if she even meant it to send to me because I never got around to asking. It was an email thread with the coach where she said "guess what?", "What? You're gonna have my baby?" "No I got Covid!". I confronted her about it, told her how it made me feel, and while she never really responded to it in a way that made me worry I still strongly disliked it and let her know that. Not long after that as we were laying in bed I saw she was texting someone exceptionally long paragraphs, you know the type, the type when you're first talking to someone and are explaining things about yourself to them? I'll spare the long part but come to find out shes found a new coach to have what appears to be an emotional affair with. Though come to find out this one ended up being physical. She broke up with me in January 22. Told me while I showed her love in a way she didn't know was possible, and treated her in a way nobody had ever treated her before that I was too good for her and deserved better. I tried to change her mind, lord knows I tried, I was madly in love. My kid was in love with her. We talked about a future I never thought possible after my divorce.
I moved out of the apartment and back to my moms until I could find a place. We talked occasionally and I spent so much time reading this sub and others. Posts about how to get her back, how to make her miss me, what to do and what not to do. When my work sabbatical ended I got my old job back. Its a great job, ridiculously easy and the amount of work I actually do compared to my compensation should be illegal. She lost her cheer stipend when we moved back to my side of town since she didn't coach and since we got the apt together I knew what her funds looked like. We got that place because we could afford it together, alone I knew she was going to struggle. And I still wanted her back... what better way to show her that and try to manifest it by just being there for her when she needed me? Little did I know that would be the only time she asked me anything. Only when she needed help, or was having an anxiety attack and needed someone to talk her off the ledge and tell her everything was going to be okay. It was never her asking how I was doing, or my kid, or my dog, or what was going on in my life. Everyone told me what my gut had already told me but I lied to myself over and over. Not long after all this happened I found out she had been seeing the new coach at the new school though she still won't admit it even up to... checks notes today.
March 23 I get my first really big commission check I gave her 10k and we paid off her credit card, some other debt she had, some missed car payments and other bill help. Not long after that she tells me shes going to a cabin nearby where shes from with her sisters and nieces/nephews and asks me to watch her dog which I miss just as much as her so I do it. Mind you previous to this we went through a rough spot and she had blocked me on IG and never unblocked me. One of my cousins still followed her though, she hits me on snapchat saying "oh wow K looks amazing" I say "Oh yeah, does the cabin look nice?" She said "Cabin? Looks like shes at the beach" and sends me a screenshot of her IG post. I do my best FBI investigation and zoom in on her glasses, it appears to be a guy taking the picture based on the reflection from the frames and I kind of have an idea who I think it could be, come to find out, we'll call him JMJ also happens to be in Florida at the same time. So I call her out and tell her she needs to find someone to come get her dog and I'm done with her and her lies. She tells me "Oh my mom and dad are traveling across the country in their RV (WHICH THEY WERE) and so when you sent me that extra money after we paid the bills my sister and I decided to fly to Florida to spend some time with them on Spring Break"
She then breaks down and tells me how shes ruined the relationship with the last genuine person in her life and that when she gets back she'll get her dog and I'll never hear from her again. Master manipulator and while shes an amazing liar to someone who wants with every fiber of his being to believe him, is awful at hiding her lies. What do I do? Well I'm a fucking idiot so you can already imagine what I did. I begged her for once to just be honest with me. For once in our entire two years going back and forth that if she ever did truly love me or respect me for things I did for her that she would be honest. She told shes not dating anyone and doesn't have a boyfriend and that nothing has changed. I told her that even if she was seeing someone and told me about it I would help her out one last time only because I had committed to it. I told myself I was doing it for altruistic reasons, that because of all her issues that if I can do for her what I said I would do for her and that would help her out in her future relationships to show her that not everybody is it out to just fuck her and leave her, that when some people tell you they'll do something for you they mean it and she stops self sabotaging then I did my part.
A couple weeks ago was her 30th birthday. I see if she wants to grab dinner but she says one of her girl teacher friends is taking her to dinner in the galleria area. Check the guys IG story via an anonymous viewer and guess who happens to be at a restaurant in the galleria area? I don't even call her out because at this point Im making a plan. I get another rather large check in July and so we had previously talked about paying off the rest of her debt. She tells me shes going to her parents house for MDW and then that shes going out of town today with one of her old friends to New Orleans. This is when I realize just whats about to happen. Im about to have the answer to the question I thought I was dying to know the answer to. I told myself if he posts an IG story today where hes traveling, there is 0% chance that shes not with him. The first thing I see when I open IG is he posted a story... in Cancun. Then the next picture I see... her phone on the table next to him. Bingo. Send her an email saying "Hey I hope you have fun in Cancun!" and that was it. Almost immediately she texts me asking how I know and figured it out and I just saw red. I immediately opened up IG and sent him a message with texts, receipts, bank transfers, her telling me that she still loves me and we can go take a trip this summer, how many times shes asked me for money and help and the lies shes told me about him. She asks me to stop messaging him and I say that shes forever lost the option to ask ANYTHING of me but realize what Im doing is not the right thing and is hella immature so I send her another email saying I'm sorry and out of respect for her I wont say anything else to him.
Then he sends me a message on IG asking to elaborate more and then told me she told him I owed her a lot of money... I asked how much and for what and he said $2k for bills when we first got together. Thats when I sent him an entire list of all bank transactions through our bank and Apple Pay. Just digital alone, $18.647.00 over the last six months plus another $12,460.00 in cash over the last eight months. Then I realized just how little better this made me feel. In fact I thought I would feel triumphant, and ready to move on and finally be over her and start to heal. Knowing full damn and well keeping her around and helping her was keeping me from being able to heal and move on. I sent her another message telling her I was taking the last part of her birthday gift to her apartment and leaving it in the ottoman outside her door and that because I had already accounted for and mentally prepared for giving her money in July that I still would then I blocked and removed her from IG and anything else that would open up an avenue for contact.
Here we are. Starting NC again... a year and a half after we broke up all because I thought I needed the answers to what I didn't want to find out or know. And that yet again, my gut has yet to lie to me in regards to relationships. What is wrong with me? Why even after all of this do I still want her in my life and want her back? If she called me tomorrow needing help I'd probably still do it. How do I fix myself? I've gotten an entire new wardrobe, an entire home gym so I quit blaming my depression for why I didn't go to the gym, and have tried really hard to focus on myself yet I know deep down everything I'm doing, I'm still doing for hopes of her. I lied to myself and clouded my own gut and mind to listen to my heart when I knew what I already knew yet still felt the need to confirm it.
Its not worth it. IT. IS.NOT. WORTH. IT. Keep that door closed if you don't want to know whats on the other side. Don't open that book if you don't want to see whats written on that last page. If your gut is telling you something, its probably right. Listen to it. When your friends and family are telling you the same thing your gut is telling you, listen to them. Even if its killing you, even if its the last thing you want to do, even if its going to break your heart again and reopen any wounds for you to bleed out again it has to be done. Don't be like me. Don't prolong your suffering for a year and a half for hope that you know isn't going to shake out in your way regardless of what the other person might be telling you.

PayPal goods/services. I may be out but I'll respond as soon as I'm able. $4.50 shipping. Scents are kept in a dark closet. I reuse packaging and I ship on the weekends.
Memorial Day sale through 6/2 - buy one full size, get one half off. (Equal or lower price will be the one that is 50% off)
Full sizes
Alkemia - Sandscape 5ml extrait roller Sun warmed beach sand, Atlantic ocean breezes, the saline-aquatic scent of drying sea water on skin, and the faintest hints of tanning oil and seaweed. RIS, tried once, $14
Astrid Merci 23 - 8ml oil Candied fruits and amber. Fill slightly below top of label. $15
Astrid Wicked Good 8ml oil Dulce de leche, apple, brownie, spiced woods, and warm vanilla musk. Not vegan. Tried twice, $18
BPAL Supposed to be a Pretzel 5ml Oil "… but also kinda smells like popcorn?" RIS, tried once, $18
Death and Floral - Vintage Cream Soda 5ml oil roller Classic A&W cream soda. Tried twice, $14.
Death and Floral - Black Forest Honey 5ml oil roller Blackened honey musk, deep and rich with a hint of blackstrap molasse (formulated in a skin-safe honey base). Tried a few times, $13
Haus of Gloi - Salty Sea Mist Covered Hay 5ml oil Hay accord with white musk, white amber, and salty sea air. Tried once, $14
Long Winter Farm - Fig & Forest 10ml oil roller Sweet, fruity fig and fir needle. It smells like both the first flow of sap in the spring and that first night after you put up the Christmas tree in winter. Tried once, $12
Long Winter Farm - Porridge 10 ml oil roller Just as warm and comforting as you want it to be, this one's a blend of oats, cinnamon, honey, dried figs, and sweet cream. Tried twice, $12
Osmofolia - Evening Sun 5ml oil roller Dried yellow corn husks and crisp green corn stalks, stacked hay bales, flaky cinnamon sugar pastries, fresh popcorn, and a field full of Evening Sun sunflowers. Tried twice, $14
Snowy White Owl Perfume - Breakfast in America 10ml oil roller blueberry buttermilk pancakes ladled with cinnamon butter, red maple syrup, bacon, and fresh black coffee. Tried once, $12
Themed/branded sample bags -
Alkemia sample bag - 4 samples direct from house - Lilacs Along the Winding Road, Camilla, Madam X, and Winter Sanctuary. All new, $12
Nui Cobalt sample bag 5 samples direct from house - Humbuggery, Hive Mind, Scallywag, Charlatan and Melophilia. All tested once, $15
Who is that/Where am I sample bag - interesting characters and places. Features brands Osmofolia (2), Morari, Stone and Wit, Poesie, Hex. 6 samples, $8.