Hi! I'm currently a 4th year student who is looking up on possible med schools that I might apply to in the near future. Just wanted to clarify, is it true that ASMPH's Merit Scholarship requires at least Magna Cum Laude standing for the Merit Scholarship? Or is it just Latin honors in general? I just wanted to know my chances of getting a scholarship there because my overall QPI hasn't reached that mark yet, and realistically I don't think it can. Thanks in advance!

Sorry I didn't post more on the story... I had a busy day today...
I didn't expect to be writing during midnight, buuut... yeah~...
Enjoy!
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Memory Transcription Subject: Slanek, Ex-UN office Venlil Citizen
Date [Standardized Human Time]: October 20, 2136
The process of identification and reintegration into civilian life was a quick on… Considering I was only in the UN guard for a few months, it wasn’t very difficult for me. However, the more stressful and annoying part was going about the process of becoming Nulia’s Legal guardian. The process as Marcel explained it to me was a tedious one, which I found to be true in more ways than one… I was willing to sit through it, I would still go through days in the office for her… That was the kind of person she needed and deserved.
I walked out of the agency with a prideful smile as I held Nulia to see her eye to eye… She still wore a sad smile but I held her close to provide her with a warm comfort she needed. I spoke to her in a soothing voice, “You're a strong girl Nulia, I know you are mourning this whole arrangement. I am too, we both miss Marcel… But he wouldn’t want us to be sad like this… We’ll both be together, and we will live our lives happily, Like Marc would want for us.”
She looked at me with saddened eyes, but she had a soft smile. I asked her, “How about we go have something to eat? I could get you some strayu? Do you like the sound of that?” As soon as I said Strayu her eyes lit up with a much happier look… she still had a sad look in her eyes, but it was no longer as prominent as it was before.
“Realsies?! Thanks Unca!” she spoke with such a peppy and excited tone… I just made my heart swell in a caring love for this Gojid youngling, even more than I initially had for her.
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Memory Transcription Notice: Chronological leap of 1.5 hours later
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As we walked along the capital’s streets I couldn’t help but notice a drastic shift in the atmosphere in the people I was walking by… I didn’t see anyone with a happy look on their face, everyone seemed so distant.
Their eyes seemed as if they peered into another dimension, some people almost ran into poles because of how lost in thought they were…
As I walked to my favorite Diner in the capital, I saw a Yotul crying just on the sidewalk… He seemed distraught, I couldn’t help but feel sorry for him… Yotul weren’t highly regarded due to their appointed status as primitives… being constantly considered a less intelligent species would be oh so debilitating for anyone, he probably grew tired of it, breaking down on the street… I felt sorry for him, I wanted to help… It’s what Marcel would have done…
“Hey”
I spoke to the Yotul which seemed to startle him… he seemed surprised that someone was addressing him in his sorrowful state…
“W-what do you want… Here to-... Chastise me like everyone else? Just leave me alone… I have a lot to cope with…”
I sighed as I responded to him, “I’m sorry for you Yotul, I don’t want to make you feel unwanted… you’ve probably had enough of that kind of treatment from others. I just want to help you… Maybe I could invite you for lunch? Nulia and I would love you as company.”
The Yotul went wide eyed at my invitation, seeming to ponder my motives… “Really?... Why me?” He asked with a suspicion ever present in his voice. It made sense. It's not every day you’re crying on the street, and you have a stranger invite you to lunch…
I responded truthfully with a caring tone… “Everyone deserves to have a good friend to lean on… I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable, but I was hoping you would be interested in joining me and my little Nulia for some strayu?””
I saw his eyes go teary as I asked him… he wiped away his tears. I reached out my paw to pull him up. “Thank you”, He said whilst taking my hand and standing up… “Who are you?”
I respond with a gentle tail wag, as my ears perk up, “I’m Slanek, who might you be Yotul?”
“Onso”
……….
Onso seemed to greatly enjoy the strayu based on how much he was stuffing himself full of it… He and Nulia both had crumbs on their cheeks, which made me chuckle ever so.
“I don’t want to remind you of whatever it was that you were crying about, but I think I have some Ideas as to what it was…”
The Yotul seemed to open his eyes as I spoke, he seemed to ease up a moment after though… “Oh… yeah, I was mourning the loss on earth… so much lost… I saw all the photos of beautiful jungles of steel… decades of development and progress all snapped away within the span of a few hours… It’s horrible… The feds are monsters for what they’ve done.”
“I agree 100%... It was oh so horrible to see all the devastation on earth.”
The Yotul tensed up as he managed to catch what I meant when I said that. He looked at me as If I just said the most planet shattering thing, he’s ever heard… he screamed, “YOU WERE ON EARTH?!?!” His outburst attracted the attention of everyone else in the diner, they all stared wide eyed at me as I was now the center of attention, it was unnerving to see so many expressions like that…
“WHAT?!”
“You were on earth?!”
“You managed to survive the bombardment?!”
Those were just a few of the many phrases I was hearing… It made sense, almost half of the human population was slaughtered, all of the most important human cities were erased…
“Thankfully yes… Nulia and I just got back today… It’s going to take a bit for me to get reacquainted with my home planet… I feel so bad for the humans on earth, I doubt it’s any better for the refugees…”
Everyone went dead silent; they looked as if I just spoke out against the great protector herself…
“You… don’t know?” Onso asked with a concerned expression… He gulped before saying, “I’d tell you, but I really don’t want the youngling to know…”
I looked down at Nulia with concern, what happened? The refugees, what could have possibly happ-... the battle of earth… oh no… oh nononononononono… My eyes went bloodshot with realization as to the idea, the mass suicide that likely resulted after the battle report… so many humans would feel such loneliness… such betrayal and fear… to take the quickest way out of a nightmare? They were definitely in a better place if that was the case…
“Onso? Did the refugees-... off themselves?” I asked in a hushed tone to avoid Nulia hearing me… The Yotul nodding at my inquiry really sent me into a spiral… my eyes flooded with dread and pain… Oh how I pitied those poor souls… May they be guided to a paradise in the next life… I was struggling to hold back tears… I wiped them away…
Onso spoke more about the details, “14% committed to the act… they all took the noose and essentially lined themselves along extermination offices across the planet, and painted them with phrases of hateful spite against everything and everyone, against the venlil and the Federation as a whole… All the remaining humans left in a massive number of shuttles that appeared during the sleep cycle. There are no humans on the planet at all anymore... they're all gone, and their parting message was that we’re all worthless cowards and deserve to be cattle for… the greys…”
My eyes widened at the comment… I felt sick… someone help me…
Please…
MARCEL, PLEASE HELP ME!...
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My Story- Moderators - feel free to file as you see fit.
I was in the same place as all of you. Name a treatment- I’ve probably had it. So… I ask you to just pause before you do something irreversible.
Five years later, I am 85% better (rough estimate). I can run. I can kayak. I ride a recumbent. I may yet get back to riding a diamond from bike. I can have sex. I don’t hate my wife. I don’t hate myself for having a vasectomy. I no longer hate my urologist. (OK the first one, but just a little).
My story. Vasectomy 2018. 48 years old. Healthy. Avid cyclist (usually one 50 mile ride per week). Prior surgical history included hydrocele and varicocele surgeries on the left side. [Yes, that’s probably should have been a “no go” for vasectomy but the intake was done by a NP and not the operating surgeon] My trust may have been misplaced. Wife had urged me for years to get “the snip”. Didn’t want to. Figured menopause was around the corner- for her. Did it anyway ☹.
Procedure was sore during- performed in office with scalpel technique. Felt a tugging on one side when the vas deferens being freed up. Unpleasant. Afterwards a little sore- had a “knot” of tissue in the left testes that took a long time (> 6 months) to resolve.
One month later, I am on vacation with wife and daughter. Struggling to keep up while walking. Progressed to burning pain, left testes and inner thigh. Occasionally radiating down to the foot. (no back pain). Worsened to 9/10 pain most days. Worst on days after sex (oddly enough during not so bad). Gave up cycling. Gave up most exercise. Very angry. Could continue to work as a physician- but struggling. Marriage went in the toilet.
Tried medication: Gabapentin, Lyrica (worked a little both made me too stupid); Duxloxetine (worked better but gave me the crazies); Meloxicam (helped a little). Topical Lidocaine(helps a lot- still my go to for break through pains).
Procedures all helped transiently with pain BUT within two months was back to baseline. Nerve blocks 3/18; 5/18 with good temporary results; Reversal of Vasectomy 9/18; Spermatic Cord Denervation 5/19; Cryoablation of nerve 4/22.
Pain Psychology- Initially a waste of time- but more on this later- just didn’t have the connection with this provider.
Pelvic floor Physical Therapy- helped a little- I carry tension in the pelvic floor (Shocker).
Alternative Therapies. Marijuana- smoked did nothing. Topical helped a bit. Tumeric, meh. Yoga- YES- could reliably bring my pain from a 6 down to a 2 or three. Meditation- also helpful- but not what I’d call fast acting. About 7,000 hours in and NOT a waste of time.
Psychadelics- Helpful, but with reservation. Don’t fuck around. Have a trusted guide. Psilocybin can open doors, but was not in an of itself a cure.
Fast forward to December 2022. Pain reasonably controlled many days. Taking topical Lidocaine 1-2x day. Go to visit a friend. Formerly an outdoorsman until he became crippled from a combination of knee pain and inguinal pain. Lost track of him for a decade. Now. He skis, he climbs. I ask…what gives? He shows me his library including John Sarno’s “Divided Mind.” Yes, he read himself well. That and some visits with a psychologist.
Sarno is great- but the science of Mind Body Medicine- has come so far since Sarno’s death in 2017. And if you think that I am saying “it’s all in your head” then you’ve probably just said “fuck off” and moved on. I cannot help you. If you are by some miracle still reading…then you can help yourself. Ask yourself “Where does your pain live?” It’s not in your balls. That healed up months or years ago.
With my first read of Sarno’s “Mind Body Prescription” I see myself throughout. Perfectionist. Check. People Pleaser Check. Sensitive Check. History of Childhood trauma. Check. I am 75% better when I put the book down. He borrows a lot from Freud- except your not being punished with pain for impure thoughts. It’s the childlike inner brain protecting you from psychological unpleasantness.
So now I take a deep dive into the reading.
Alan Gordon’s “The Way Out” My number one recommendation. Picks up where Sarno left off. And the science has advanced a lot. PLUS, Gordon, once a stand-up comedian- is very readable.
Want to go deeper? Bessel Vander Kolk’s, The Body Keeps The Score. Yes- the body is where we store trauma that is too much for our brains to handle.
There are many more- but once on this path- you will find them.
Apps: Curable. Free trial.
Podcasts: “Like Body Like Mind” “The Cure for Chronic Pain”
Think about it. Is this your first rodeo with chronic pain? Ever have back pain, migraines, irritable bowel? If not, you are are blessed. Have you had NO trauma in your life? This is ‘Merica. Odds are, you have. And that does not have to determine the rest of your life.
Brothers- Four years ago I would have thought present day me was full of crap. Heck, I am not 100% better yet- so why believe me? Because I am 85% better- and am confident that I’ll get the rest of the way there. Furthermore, having this pain journey has given me insight into how childhood trauma impacted my thought process in other ways. And now I am turning it around. And with some work. Not a drug, not a surgery. You will get there too. Until then, please don’t cut off your balls.

It was 10:20pm; I was driving down 35 in the direction of San Marcos. As I was approaching the CMV truck stop I see a man standing over what looks like a woman laying in the grass 5 to 10 ft from the third lane. There was not a car pulled off the side of the road anywhere close to where these people were located. I hate the guilt feeling of wanting to make sure these people are safe but remembering I have to put my safety first. Anyone experienced anything similar? My brain immediately jumped to them being some sort of human trafficking set up. It felt odd with how close they were to the interstate without a vehicle in sight. I did call the San Marcos police station and file a report

I’m 18+ and all characters and participants must be 18+
The central room is a large, wide open space, with all the wall, the floor and the ceiling the same dull grey owing to the concrete from which they were constructed. Off of this main room were six cells, with traditional metal bars and few amenities one might expect, though they were larger than typical.
This is the basic set for a new reality show, The Prison. Six self proclaimed sluts will be kept here, and put through persistent sexual torments. There are no points, no votes, the only way to lose is to tap out, to give up, to leave. Last one standing wins the 12 million dollar prize. While the producers expected it to be over within a month, stubborn competitors could theoretically stretch this thing out over years.
I have been selected as one of the six competitors for the inaugural season, prepared to do what it takes to win, however long it takes.
Hopefully that has given you an idea of what I'm looking for here. The idea is that I will play this woman, a contestant on the new reality show The Prison, going through constant use and abuse in hopes of taking home the grand prize. As for you, you'd take charge of everyone else!
Kinks: cum, cum eating, cum food, cum play,bukkake,cream pie,bdsm, bondage, forced, body writing, spanking, cuddling, degradation, rough partners, sizeplay, dominant partners, toys, multiple partners, spit roasting, mating press, full Nelson,frenching,rimming,body oil,bestiality,water sports,wax play,sex machines,being filmed,cosplay,petplay,exhibitionism,biting and pretty much anything that isn’t my limits
Limits:
Scat,gore,vore,hyper sizes,necro and vomit
If that's of interest to you, please get in touch, and come with any questions you have, clarifications you need and ideas you'd like to share. Just please do more than just tell me you're interested. Don't worry about responding slowly/late, I still want to hear from you. Finally, please no chat requests, I will simply ignore them.

I grew up in a Christian household that was pretty loose about the whole thing but I was forced to go to church every Sunday, attend Sunday school, and then attend Catholic middle and high school. I sometimes have nightmares that I'm back in those places and I'm trying to get away.
I grew up being taught that I should meet a man, get married and be a good wife and mother. My own mother never taught me to be independent or to stand up for myself (taught myself honestly.)
Not to mention all the "you're gonna burn in hell" stuff that plagued my mind as a child. I used to cry at night because I thought Satan was under my bed.
I stopped it all in my teen years when I wised up to the hypocrisy and BS. Anyone else still have fleeting episodes of flashbacks or nightmares?

Hi, so...
I'm gonna talk a lot. It took me an hour to type this on my phone, apparently... 😅 But, if you just want the meat of my rant, skip to the very bottom, the "where life has me now" part. Or, better yet:
TL;DR - I have no friends anymore, my ex was my best friend and now I have no one. I've had a rough few weeks what with everything that's gone wrong (one after the other, thanks 2023), and I just don't have anyone to process it with. I miss my best friend...

Backstory, I guess

I was in a poly relationship for 7 years with this girl. Primary partner. She sometimes had other boyfriends but none ever stuck. I saw a few other people too but never even got to the point of calling it another date. It worked out more like we were open/ENM rather than poly, but anyway, just setting up some color to the backstory. We were all but married, owned a house together, raising her step-kids together, got pets together... all that. "Married" but not married.
We were both friendly with this guy we knew from community theater. She got close to him almost a year ago, they started seeing each other. Grew feels. We were poly so I was excited for her. Yay!

The decline...

After a few months, she reveals that he is monogamous. Ugh, not the first time she's dated a mono guy, but he wanted to chat with me and I did too, so I was hopeful we could understand each other better.
She started pulling away from my touch, trying to avoid contact with me so as not to upset her new boyfriend. Uhh... anyway, he was constantly busy and never had time to chat with me, and then she at one point asked if I would even care if she broke up with me. Obviously, lol, why wouldn't I be?
We kept fighting over little things more and more for the next month, until I snapped and suggested we break up since she seems so sure I'm awful now.
When we talked about it a few days later, she said she's ready to be done with me, doesn't think she'll ever feel romantic for me again, didn't want to even try couple's therapy (unless it was necessary to salvage our friendship), and that she had these issues with me for years. My takeaway from this is that she was convincing herself that I was worse than she remembered in order to feel less shitty about breaking up with me for her new boy.
She had said when/before we broke up that she would take a break from her new boy too. Naturally once we broke up, she changed it to "just a break" with me, but no break with him, because "that wouldn't be fair to him" and "the heart wants what it wants".
Whatever... I still held out hope.

The break

So, for the next four months, we still lived together. At first we were okay with sharing the bed and just made it a point to not touch.
She continued to see him, sometimes 2 days out of the week, sometimes 6 days of the week. I kept making dinner and hung out with her two kids (13 and 15). Oh, I forgot to mention that I work full time and am also in college classes nearly full-time, so I'm always busy with homework too. No matter. The point here is that she's not around much, which is fine but feels like a lot at times.
I did reach out to her a few times after two months, asking to get some time with her, check in, hang out, whatever. She kept having plans already, so I'd shoot for a week or two out. She'd halfway make plans, then the conversation would die. When it would come around, she would blow me off, "oh they needed me for a few extra hours at church, sorry!". (I believe her, but it's clear I ranked lower in priority than anything). Other times she "could be home after lunch, which happens at 11"... but then "after" was apparently 5pm. After a few tries like this, I gave up.
I finally asked her if we were done. I wanted to have the conversation in a park or restaurant or something... she refused and instead we had it with her sitting in bed with her PJs on, practically hiding under the covers. I told her I had about 40% desire left to see us fix things, that it has been dwindling since she keeps acting like I'm a stranger, but there's still hope. She just repeated that she doesn't see us ever being romantic again, so when I asked her to put it to a number, she said 0%.
So, that's it. Done.

Moving forward...

That was about two months ago. We still live together while we work out the house. I want to move, and I'd rather sell altogether. She can't refinance to buy me out, but she wants to stay. Ugh... so we might work something out to where we split equity on sale later down the road.... that's a whole 'nother headache that I won't even get into just yet, because I've got other problems right now.
We split the room up a little... I now have a cot in here, so we sleep separately. For the most part we do okay as roommates I suppose, but it's still awkward as fuck living with my ex. I still consider the kids mine too, but it feels weird when they're all hanging out together. I guess it should, though. Hrm.
Anyway.

Where life has me right now

I haven't been great about keeping in contact with friends. I was friends with her friends, though, but while we rarely see them anymore anyway, I feel like they're even more unavailable now. (She actually told them not to hate me on her behalf, that she still wants some friendliness between all of us... but, whatever. It's dead.) So, I'm alone.
The kids are teenagers. I still feel familial with them, but there's always been a little bit of step distance between us. One of them just came out as trans.
My bathroom skylight has a hole in it. First people I brought out tried hard-selling me a whole new roof. Yeah, that shit was a horrible experience. Anyway, next guy who came out just quoted me for a skylight. Pfft. It's always something though right?
My old car has been leaking everywhere for the last few months, and finally stopped starting (intermittently). I suspect it's a head gasket, but I'm not a mechanic so idk. I've been considering car shopping anyway, so maybe now is the time, especially since the mechanics looking at my car have pointed out two sensors to start troubleshooting with for $580, and aren't sure if that's the fix. That's a little expensive for troubleshooting what could be a head gasket... so, cue car shopping under duress.
We talked with a lawyer this week about the house and splitting the equity on sale when she moves out, because again, she doesn't want to move (because of the kids), and I do. That turned into an argument where she thinks I'm the bad guy trying to evict her kids because I won't accept so little, and me standing my ground saying I deserve more than just what the current equity is right now because at minimum I should get interest on it since I'm unable to touch this money for 4 years (per the current plan), much like a loan.
Anyway, we talk and eventually she cools down. She lets me borrow the car for the weekend at least while she's camping with her boyfriend. Cool.
I realize I picked too high of a monthly commitment for the car I want, so I spent the long weekend re-budgeting to see what I can afford, and where I need to cut back on my spending.
I've been looking at cars and shooting a few to a coworker friend and an old friend who is also going through a divorce that I chat with sometimes. Both respond here and there but aren't engaged with helping me. I don't blame them, they have lives too, but it leaves me feeling like I'm on my own here. Fine, I can't expect people to help me make financial decisions anyway.
Go to the dealership by myself this evening... The dude I work with... It feels like he's misread me, like he thinks I want some hot new car, rather than something functional and cheap. He seems to be annoyed that I'm taking my time to look at things, and didn't fall for his lease pitch. We bargain, I get some good numbers, so it was all around fine... but it's clear we both want to be done with each other for the day. He mentions they're closing up shop, I take my leave to think about it for a day.
Anyway. Now I'm home again. On my cot.
I just want to decompress and process my day with someone, but I just don't have anyone to talk to. I mean, there's people I can talk to but goddamn I don't feel like I have anyone I can just level with, at least not when I need them.
Goddamn I feel so alone.
I lost my best friend, and the shell of her is sleeping one bed away from mine.
I... and, maybe I should get out more, but first I need a car, and my house fixed, and free time separate from school, and not worry about coming to an agreement with the house, and maybe it would be nice to have moved out so I can finally mentally move on.... Maybe then I'll have free time for making new friends. Idfk. Is this just another excuse? Am I just not a social person, and now I'm suffering for it during my most challenging period of life?
I hate this.

At about the same time as the original Gillette safety razors were offered for sale, Henrie Clauss filed a patent for a spring loaded hoe razor. It was a reasonable straight forward razor, using a single edged Christy-style blade. So let us have a look at what made it stand out from the crowd.
Like so many razor patents, the patent text describes the invention as containing “new and useful improvements”. And while it might have been novel – or at least novel enough for a patent – I’m unsure of the usefulness.
The patent lists several objects the invention set out to achieve. The patented razor should obviate the liability of loosing parts. It should allow for quickly opening and closing the razor, as well as locking the razor opn. And locking it closed too. And the result?
Patent drawing for US patent 838,009
Well, the long and the short of is is that Clauss’ spring loaded hoe razor was nothing less than a single edge twist to open. Perhaps not the earliest Twist To Open, but certainly an earlier example than all others I've seen.
It has a couple of interesting features.
Unlike GEM and EverReady razors, the spring (28) that pushed the blade forward had two points of contact (30), controlled by slots (31) cut on the top cap. This, along with upturned lugs (9) on either side of the base plate and stop-lugs (8) holds the blade secure when the top cap is close.
The top cap is controlled by a knob at the bottom of the handle. This is secured to the handle with a long tie-rod (19) and tensioned by a coil-spring (23). A bayonet lock locks the knob in the up-position. The spring pulls the pin on the knob against the bottom of the handle in the downward position.
All in all I think that Clauss’ spring loaded hoe razor looks pretty good. But the market for safety razors in the early 20th century was – if you all excuse the pun – cutthroat. And against competitors that were already entrenched in the marked, being pretty good was often not good enough.
According to Waits’ Compendium, Henrie and his brother John H was already manufacturing shears, and possible cutlery, when the patent was filed. Despite a few name changes, the company was still in business as of 2005.
You can read the full patent at Google Patents. If you enjoy this sort of things, why not check out my other posts on shaving patents and other shaving oddities?

And I don't mean anything major. When I first meet people, I try to make sure I ways treat them right. How I would want to be treated if I thought I deserved it. I treat people better than I deserve to be treated. I give them all my attention and time, buy them gifts, pay for meals, and I compliment them. I try to make sure everyone is having a good time, no one feels left out, and I stand up for my friends if they are in the right, even if I know it will end up hurting me somehow. I have always been very popular and well liked by my peers I make friends easily and it is super easy to become very close to anyone. It is like within a couple of weeks, my friends and I go from strangers to best of siblings.
But, then, the moment I feel someone has hurt me, it is like a switch in my heart has flipped. I become malicious and manipulative. I start holding everything I've done for them against them. I call in my favors. I start underminding them and getting them to self-doubt themselves. Every new thing they do that even annoys me, I will blow out of proportion and yell at them. I give them bad advice and trear down their accomplishments. My compliments become backhanded. I hurt myself knowing these people who love me will be hurt by seeing me hurt.
I have friends I've been close to for years because they never hurt me in any way. But I also burn through close friends so quickly because I feel wronged by the dumbest things.
I don't know why I am like this. I love people, I really do. People always think I'm so sweet and optimistic and caring. I think I am, too, sometimes. I thought maybe I am a narcissist, and I am only pretending to care. But I am very open about my flaws. I constantly give genuine apologizes to people for the smallest of things. I do think I am superior to other people in some ways, but I also think I am very inferior to other people in other ways. I think maybe I am trying to drive people away from me, because I am too weak willed to cut them out, myself.
I know this isn't healthy. I just cannot stop. I wish I could learn to forgive people.

Everyone wants Soohyun Choi--he's tall, muscular, gorgeous, and he's a talented interior designer. But there's something people don't know. Soohyun's ex wrecked his confidence by saying he was a boring lay, and now he can't get it up! He decides that the only solution is to switch positions and become a bottom. But it's hard for someone Soohyun's size to find a top who's big enough to dominate him ... Read Sentimental Reasons - Chapter 35 - MangaPuma. Read more at https://mangapuma.com/sentimental-reasons/chapter-35

I’m 25F, 345 pounds, 5’8”, pre-diabetic. I’ve always struggled with my weight, was always overweight.
Since April 27th I’ve been unemployed. I only started working for the first time in my life this January. Before that, I had isolated myself due to severe social anxiety disorder. I finally got some treatment for it and have been doing better, better enough to finally start working. Although I still do struggle sometimes.
I started work at Amazon. It was absolutely killer on my body, especially my feet. 10 hour shifts standing on concrete plus my 345 pound body weighing down on them, I would be in excruciating pain almost daily. Before this job I was completely sedentary. So going from 0 to 100 didn’t help at all. Unsurprisingly, due to me leaving work so frequently because I was hurting too much, I got fired in April.
Pretty quickly I found another job as a sewing machine operator which helped since I was sitting, but it was an extremely toxic workplace and I quit. Plus I would run out if work frequently but I’m not a skilled enough sewer to have done more complex work there.
So right now I’m looking for another job. I’m in a tough spot since I know any physical job, standing on my feet all day, is going to be unbearable. But then any desk job involves a lot of socializing. I’m not skilled, I didn’t graduate college, so basic jobs are all the options I have.
Right now I’m considering two sort of drastic options in terms of how to create a better future for myself. One is going back to school/getting some training to help me get a better job. The second is getting weight loss surgery so I’ll be in better physical condition to work.
The big issue is that I don’t have money for weight loss surgery. And I’m turning 26 in September so I won’t be able to use my dad’s insurance anymore.
Would it be a dumb decision to try to get a medical loan in order to get weight loss surgery? I kind of see it as the better option because it could help my extremely low energy levels and help me have less pain so I’m able to work on my feet. Then typically jobs have tuition reimbursement or some sort of programs in order to get higher education. Like if I had didn’t have the pain I had working at Amazon, I would be happy to work there still. The pay is good and there’s opportunities to get higher education.
I strongly feel that I will not be able to get to a healthy weight on my own. I’ve tried losing weight so many times. I was successful for a little bit with calorie counting but my hunger would become too much and I’d give up. For me having some physical reason for not eating helps. For example, I can’t eat nuts like peanuts or cashews because they make my stomach hurt so bad. Bc of that, I don’t eat those foods. If I actually stayed full, physically couldn’t eat more, that would help a lot. Although also I’m really addicted to sugary drinks, which I have continuously tried quitting but always go back to. My big thing is sugary coffee and Pepsi.
I’m just at my limit. I can’t keep living like this. It was easy to live like this when my mental health was bad and family was taking care of me. But it’s time to take care of myself and to get there I need to lose weight. Which partly sucks because I have come to love my body for the first time in my life. But my health issues and pain are something I cannot keep ignoring. At least I know I’m not doing this solely for looks.
I am going to start following a keto diet now though. It’s going to be hard since carbs have been my life but I’ve heard a lot of quick success stories with keto and that’s what I need right now. Although long-term, I can’t see me being on keto forever because being able to enjoy some of my favorite food just in moderation is important to me. I want to be able to eat some mochi here and there.
Anyways, any advice at all would be so appreciated. Thank you for reading.

I’ve made a post nearly every night so far of our sleep training journey and this question still stands my 13 month old (10 months adjusted) baby just will not lay down. She sits up straight bobbing her head all night and waking up every few minutes. She isn’t crying when she wakes but just falls back asleep.
Today was miserable, she was screaming all day. Slept in 4 more hours after I just took her in my bed at 6 am. Wanting to nap an hour into wake windows and just crying all day. I feel terrible but anytime I go into gently lay her down (I even waited hoursss at one point to make sure she was deep into sleep) she always wakes up screaming and the cycle starts over.
I feel so bad for her, she knows how to lay down, we were doing it all day today so I could make sure she got practice. I can’t sleep either, I watch the monitor all night waiting for her to fall. Does this pass? If so when? We’re on night 4 and she never lays down.

1. Having to verify 100's and even 50's ; When my manager decides to go on lunch and it's just me in the store, I have to stand and wait or I will get written up for not verifying the bill.

I've worked with money since I was 16, I know how to verify a 100 dollar bill.
Also, a lot of my customers take offense to it and think that I am calling a manager because I think their bill is fake. I have to explain over and over it's just policy.

1. Poles on carts ; I understand why. But people just tilt the cart a certain way to get it outside. Meaning I have to somehow do the same and get it back inside

Some people need help getting their items to their car, and the poles prevent that.

1. No item voids ; When I first started a few item voids were fine. Now just one will get me written up.

This slows down everything for everyone in the store, because I now have to call a manager and wait. The entire line has to wait. If my manager disappeared I have to do an item void and get in trouble for it.

1. Unverified service animals ; I have no issue with animals in the store, I do have an issue with animals in the basket with no blanket or towel underneath them. People put food in that and I've never ever seen someone clean them.

Any others?

Through listening to over 1500 hours of Kanye, I’ve made my top 3 Kanye albums… it’s hard to pick, they’re all beautiful, but I think this is my list
3-Graduation: Graduation is such a colorful and playful album in so many ways that I think that it needs to be in my top 3. It feels like cartoon happiness, rainbows and like there’s a fucking crazy unicorn spewing fat bars 24/7. The glory is my personal favorite song on the album because driving down the highway screaming about how with my ego, I could stand anywhere with a speedo and still be someone’s hero=good
2-Yeezus: I like yeezus for basically the exact opposite reasons as graduation. It feels like a wall made of sheet metal. It’s harsh, it’s jagged, and it’s kinda ridiculous to make a wall out of sheet metal, but the way the the album plays with the ridiculousness of it’s sound like the polyrhythmic beat of im in it at the beginning is what makes it a top ye masterpiece
1: for me, TLOP is the best. I mean shit 30 hours legit gives me a semi whenever it comes on god damn I love that song, and No more parties in la makes me want to go to Mulholland drive set up a bunch of roadside barricades, then drive down at 80 in a Range Rover texting tinder bitches like god fucking damn. Saint Pablo’s… fuck. Just play the second half of the album and explode your ears

Buckle up this may be a long one…
I recently got sick and have been out for about a week n a half now, during this time away from just constantly grinding it out at work and home I’ve had time to reflect on what I’ve been considering and am losing my mind. I’ve been apprenticing for about 5 months now and have been tattooing for 3 of those 5. Theres a multitude of reasons I’m considering quitting and the main ones are that my bosses are really shitty, and I mean all around shitty. Shitty people, shitty work, shitty attitudes, etc. they steal other tattooers work and trace quite literally everything. When I first started I was under the impression I would be mentored by my tattoo artist but that he wouldn’t be there all the time bc he takes care of his kid and does other stuff which is understandable, so I’d learn mostly everything from the owners of the shop (a husband and wife) with whom I’d met before and thought they were nice people so I said sure why not. Come to find that my artist is only there for 2 days out of the week for about 3-4 hours a day working on some big pieces for his clients, and one of the days he comes in is one of my days off. The very little that I have learned from him contradicts everything that I’m taught by the owners, which is just confusing and annoying to deal with tbh.
From the start I’ve had problems with the owners and the way that they do things at the shop, the husband (tattooer for 25 yrs) and wife (tattooer of 30 yrs) claim to just be super old school and don’t fuck with anything that has to do with new ideas, basically if I came in with an iPad I’d be crucified. They also constantly shit talk my “mentor”, the one who works in the shop a few hours a week, saying his work sucks and that the things he says is bullshit and whatnot and forget about any other artists in the area, if you were to bring up someone outside the shop it’s a shitstorm, They even shit talk Freddy fucking Corbin. Yes the legend Freddy fucking Corbin. They constantly bring in their problems and other bullshit from home to the point where I’ve seen the wife cry multiple times and have tantrums over family drama at the shop. Anytime I’ve had a problem I basically am told to shut up and suck it up “because that’s the game of tattooin!”.
As I said I’ve been tattooing 3 of the 5 months that I’ve been an apprentice which even I know is fucking insane I went into it thinking that It would be a minimum of 6 months before I even touched a machine let alone tattooing on a human being. Which reminds me, before I had my license or BBP certification they had me TATTOOING WALKINS my first day I did 7 tattoos and was having major panic attacks in between lmao. That being said I still have no idea what I’m doing and am extremely frustrated and stressed by the situation that I’ve put myself into. Honestly there is so much more I could go into about how these people act and are but it would just be a book thicker than the Bible. Am I just being a pussy here or do I have some validity to what I’m thinking?
Sorry if I’ve been all over the place in this post but Im getting worked up just thinking about this and I honestly don’t know what to do. Im thinking about just pushing through this and trying to finish the 2 yr apprenticeship so that I don’t have to go through it again but I know I have so many bad habits but I just wanted to learn. Oh and to polish off this turd sandwich, they said if I quit that I can’t take any of the equipment that I purchased with MY money. Which includes a $400 power supply, $40 foot pedal, $500 coil machines, my tray and inks. Please help me decide here I just don’t know what to do.

Hey, Been thinking about applying for the Low voltage apprenticeship but not sure if its a great fit for my personality. I was a groundman on my way into the lineman side but ended up quitting a really good job because I couldn't stand the work. I've been apart of the IBEW and would like to still pursue a career within the electrical industry.
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I tried to watch as many videos as possible on low voltage but there aren't to many on youtube to get a good feel of what a days work really like. I can be pretty impatient and get overwhelmed at time when installing random things with instructions. When I watch and see so many cables all over the place and the tedious work I wonder if it just give me a headache. Is this just normal thinking from someone outside watching and becomes easy after learning? What traits make a good candidate?
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Thanks for any input

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The key to losing weight is to burn more calories than you consume. You can accomplish this by consuming fewer calories and increasing the number of calories burned through physical activity. While this appears to be simple, implementing a practical, effective, and long-term weight-loss plan can be difficult.
Your weight is a balancing act, and calories play a role in that. The key to losing weight is to burn more calories than you consume. You can accomplish this by consuming fewer calories and increasing the number of calories burned through physical activity.
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https://preview.redd.it/mvq4l2019w2b1.jpg?width=240&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=41073808be35dd156c4b54a8f3ccfa0eccded141
While this appears to be simple, implementing a practical, effective, and long-term weight-loss plan can be difficult. However, you are not required to do it alone. Seek help from your doctor, family, and friends. Consider whether the time has come for you to make the necessary changes. Also, plan ahead of time: Prepare for situations that will test your resolve and the inevitable minor setbacks.
If your weight is causing serious health problems, your doctor may recommend weight-loss surgery or medications. In this case, your doctor will go over the potential benefits and risks with you. But don't forget the bottom line: Making changes to your diet and exercise habits is the key to successful weight loss.

Diet Plan

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https://preview.redd.it/fqixe55h9w2b1.jpg?width=413&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1d5ee7fb984ddde194729f19b3687aa418253ccd
There are numerous diet plans available for weight loss. Any magazine rack will have the most recent and greatest diet plans. But how do you know if a diet plan is right for you and your lifestyle?
Ask yourself the following questions about any diet plan you're thinking about:
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Does it include foods from all of the major food groups, such as fruits, vegetables, grains, low-fat dairy products, lean protein sources, and nuts?
• Does it include foods that you enjoy and would eat for the rest of your life, not just for a few weeks or months?
• Can you easily find these foods at your local supermarket?
• Will you be able to eat your favorite foods or even all of them?
• Is it compatible with your lifestyle and budget?
• Does it contain enough nutrients and calories to help you lose weight safely and effectively?
• Is regular physical activity planned?
If you answered no to any of these questions, keep looking. There are better diet plans available to you.

Diet and exercise

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https://preview.redd.it/0us78dpr9w2b1.jpg?width=395&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0dd988d18a24fe36456a92c86f78342b30b932c1
Developing healthy eating and exercise habits is the key to successful weight loss. Diet and exercise may not be your favorite words. But don't get too caught up in them. Diet simply means eating nutritious, low-calorie meals. Exercising entails becoming more physically active.
Although people focus on diet when trying to lose weight, physical activity is also an important component of a weight-loss program. When you're active, your body uses energy (calories) to move, which helps to burn the calories you eat.
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https://preview.redd.it/ye2o4hfv9w2b1.jpg?width=463&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d5372c91226ce0e3b236cceebf014b7a9bbf38cf
Cleaning the house, making the bed, going grocery shopping, mowing the lawn, and gardening are all examples of physical activity. Exercise, on the other hand, is a regular, structured, and repetitive form of physical activity.
Do whatever activity you choose on a regular basis. Aim for at least 150 minutes of moderate physical activity per week or 75 minutes of vigorous aerobic activity per week, spread out over the week. Keep in mind that you may require more physical activity to lose and keep the weight off.
Click here to read more articles

Special Delivery (Prologue)
Awakening
I wake up in the living room of a house, disoriented and uneasy. Something feels off, as if the world around me is shifting. I look towards the front window, expecting sunlight to illuminate the room, but instead, I notice flaws developing on the glass. Shadows dance across the walls, and the brightness of the day wavers, creating an eerie atmosphere.
Did it just get really dark in here? No….it’s perfectly lit. Did that happen?
As I try to make sense of my surroundings, I realize that the furniture is arranged in a peculiar manner.
The box, in all its enigmatic simplicity, stood in the center of the room like an ordinary cardboard container. Its unassuming appearance held no grandeur or ornate embellishments, contrasting starkly with the peculiar events unfolding around it. It seemed like an artifact of mundanity, with no indication of the mysteries it concealed within.
The surface of the box was plain and unadorned, a humble facade that betrayed no secrets. It bore no intricate carvings or elegant patterns, just the rough texture of brown cardboard. Its corners were slightly dented, bearing witness to the wear and tear of its journey, adding to the unremarkable nature of its appearance.
On one side of the box, the word "Croatian" was carelessly scrawled in haphazard handwriting, as if an afterthought or a hurried addition. The letters appeared sloppy and uneven, lacking any aesthetic finesse. They stood out in stark contrast against the plainness of the box, their sloppiness serving as a stark reminder of the enigma that surrounded us.
Am I in Croatia? How did I end up here?
I'm not alone. Other people are also in the room, their presence equally bewildering. Tension hangs in the air, and unease grips us all.
Unable to contain my curiosity, I break the silence. "My name is Todd," I introduce myself. "Please, introduce yourselves and give a bit of backstory. Why are you here, and where exactly is 'here'?"
An Introduction
A voice quivers with fear as Steve speaks up. "My name is Steve, and I need to leave!" He rushes towards the front door, desperately searching for an escape route. But as he tries to open the door, he realizes it's locked tight. Panic sets in as he frantically attempts to find a way out.
Driven by determination, Steve retreats to the opposite doorway, preparing for a daring escape. He takes a running start, covering an astonishing distance that seems to extend beyond the limits of the house itself. We watch, filled with suspense, as Steve hurtles towards the door. But to everyone's shock, disaster strikes. He collides with the door and is instantly flattened, his lifeless body pulverized into a momentary gruesome sight as he is consumed by thin air. His disappearance leaves us all stunned and mystified.
“Is anyone else named Steve?”
The girl in the corner lets out a blood-curdling scream, her cries growing louder and more piercing with each passing moment. Suddenly, the corner of the house extends forward, distorting its dimensions and forming a grotesque mouth. In a horrifying turn of events, the corner engulfs the girl, swallowing her whole. There's no trace left, no remnants of her existence. The once-lively room falls silent, engulfed in an eerie calmness. Outside, clouds gather, obscuring the natural daylight. The remaining occupants of the house are paralyzed with terror, their screams silenced by an unknown force.
Transformation
As we stand frozen in fear, the room undergoes a surreal transformation. Ceilings rise, and the space expands, stretching beyond our comprehension. A figure hovers in the far corner, contorted and suspended in mid-air. With astonishing speed, the figure hurtles towards us, defying the laws of physics.
Before I can even process the situation, I wake up abruptly. The room returns to its previous state, unchanged from when I first arrived. However, something is amiss. A figure stands outside in the front yard, peering into the house. Darkness cloaks their features, adding to the enigma surrounding their presence. The house remains unusually illuminated, devoid of light switches or outlets, emanating a piercing brightness that defies reason.
The other three individuals in the room are still unconscious, unaware of the impending transformation that will forever alter their lives. An aura of uncertainty hangs in the air, foreshadowing the profound changes that await us.
What's in the Box?
Morning breaks, and the clock on the wall reads 8 o'clock. The remaining occupants of the house awaken, their faces etched with deep contemplation. Outside, a small crowd has gathered, their murmurs filling the air. Tension permeates the atmosphere as anticipation builds.
Suddenly, a voice booms from the box, answering the question that has plagued us all. "You are, Chad. You are in the box," it says, sending shivers down my spine. Chad, taken aback, rises from his spot, but a dark cloud materializes beneath him, enveloping his body. The cloud ascends, swallowing Chad entirely, leaving no trace behind.
Claire, Chad's sister, rushes to the box, desperate for answers or a glimpse of her brother. Darkness greets her gaze as she peers into the box. The bottom of the box transforms into a swirling void, and before anyone can react, Claire plunges into the abyss, disappearing into nothingness. I stand there, astounded, unable to trust my own eyes.
Admittance
Sharon's voice breaks the silence, revealing a crucial piece of the puzzle. She confesses, "I know why this is happening." Her words hang heavy with guilt and realization. She recounts the events of our ill-fated night, a celebration at the club after Chad passed the BAR exam, and her consumption of a pill for her Fibromyalgia. A strange dizziness had clouded her senses, making it hard to see clearly. Something terrible had occurred, but the details remained hazy in her memory.
Unbeknownst to Sharon, her collision with Elijah, our neighbor's 16-year-old son, had resulted in a tragic accident that claimed his life. The night took an unexpected turn when Chad, mischievous as ever, seized the opportunity and pilfered some of Sharon's pain medication. With a sly grin, he expertly crushed a pill and discreetly added it to her drink, unknowingly setting in motion a series of bizarre events. As the night progressed, Claire laughed, playfully suggesting that the drink needed a proper mix to avoid arousing suspicion. Little did they know the dark consequences that would follow.
Meanwhile, Steve's true identity remains shrouded in mystery, his presence lost amidst the chaos and terror that unfolded around us. Everyone knew each other in that room though, I can feel it. The inside of the house is filled with blinding light.
The crowd outside watches in awe as the house, engulfed in an inferno, burns with an intensity that defies explanation. The flames consume the structure, yet never spread beyond its boundaries, confounding onlookers and amplifying the sense of otherworldly occurrences.
The fact that this fire had been burning at the same rate for five days didn’t reinforce natural explanations.
As I awaken once again, I find myself in an unfamiliar setting—a dimly lit warehouse. The shadows play tricks on my eyes, and a sense of foreboding fills the air.
A box sits in the center of the warehouse.
__________________________________________________________________________

Timestamps
All prices include US shipping and PayPal fees. Feel free to send me any reasonable offers, bundles will be heavily discounted and prioritized. Local pickup is also available in the metro ATL area.
Please comment before PMing if interested and no chats please. All items will most likely go out the next business day after purchase. Thank you for looking.

Item	Description	Price (Shipped)
Mc65 Black	Like new condition. Currently built but will come unbuilt with stock desoldered PCB and alu plate. Includes carrying case and brass + frosted PC badge for RGB goodness. Very nice feeling top mount with a low front height and a unique aesthetic with the badge + weight. I'll be happy to provide a sound test in PMs if interested. Price is dropped from my last post. Open to trading for Bias, 910 ME, or other similar-valued boards or possible with PP on my side depending on the trade.	$599/Trade for similar-valued boards
Noxary 378 Meteorite Gray	Flawless, A-stock. Includes 2 PCB's (1 brand new, 1 desoldered) and 2 plates (5mm PC + red alu). Gaskets are installed on the case. The gray ano is gorgeous in person and almost Apple space grey like. Selling for way below retail when factoring in the extras. Open to trades for boards like a Matrix Corsa or Bias, or even just a color swap to red.	$535/Color swap to red or trade for other boards
RS60 Red WKL w/ Hotswap H60 + Extras	Comes with a hotswap H60 (multi-layout support), brand new solder H60, and 2 plates (alu + PC). Nearly perfect condition except for two very minor marks near the USB port. Selling at well below retail especially factoring in the cost of the extras. Price is dropped from my last post.	$385
GMK Fuji Katakana Base + Spacebars	Like new, mounted a few times but it has less than an hour's worth of use. Spacebars are practically brand new. Open to trades for other GMK sets like Iceberg, Zooted, Beta, Analog Dreams, or others.	$155/Trade for other GMK sets
GMK Lavender Spacebars	Brand new and unused. Selling less than Space Cables extras.	$35
HammerWorks CRP R4 Kits	All brand new. Prices per kit are listed but the bundle is discounted and preferred. Modern Mac Icons (Beige) - $35, Blue Windows (Cross) - $11, R5 - $21	Individual kits in desc/$49 bundled
Keycult No. 1/65 PCB + UHMWPE/Half FR4 Plates	All brand new. The PCB is originally a Wilba solder PCB for the Rama Jules but will work fine on the 1/65. Also open to splitting the plates together as a bundle but not the PCB. Price is dropped from my last post.	$95 bundled/$57 for plates
Thermal60 SEQ2 Hotswap PCB + Rose Plate (brand new)	Both brand new and unused. Selling less than Rama even before shipping.	$95
Hiney H88C	Brand new and unused. North-facing, non-thin 1.6mm PCB's. Selling at below NK pricing. Price is dropped from my last post.	$45
Cloudline Full PC Plate	Brand new and unused. Selling at less than CK extras after shipping/taxes. Price is dropped from my last post.	$49
Vega POM Plate	Mounted with switches once or twice but like new. Universal layout. Price is dropped from my last post.	$25
Alchemy Artisan Box (Hard Black/Brass)	Used on my monitor riser for a few months. It has some marks from removing and mounting artisans due to the hard anodizing (same as KC tray) but nothing too noticable once filled. I've tried to clean off some of them with alcohol and they seem to come out with some effort. The brass badge has a little patina and the bottom brass piece has some marks from moving around. Selling at my original cost.	$155
CYSM Viva Magenta Keyby	Selling at less than retail. Brand new and never mounted. I'm also open to trading for other Keybys. Price is dropped from my last post.	$95/Trade for other Keybys
GMK Dualshot Namong Cosmo Rudory	Like new, mounted once. It's a near-perfect match with Dualshot but I prefer Cherry profile artisans. Price is dropped from my last post, now at retail.	$115
Asero GMK Arch White Alu Artisan	Like new, mounted once. Selling below retail. Price is dropped from my last post.	$59
GMK Aegyptus Rama Tray	Brand new and unused. Selling at my GB price after shipping. Price is dropped from my last post.	$55

Also looking to buy the below:

WTB
TGR 910 ME Solder PCB